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Sane and intelligent human beings are like all other human beings, and carefully and cautiously and diligently conceal their private real opinions from the world and give out fictitious ones in their stead for general consumption.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Opinion
Carefully
Give
Sane
Human
Opinions
Stead
Humans
Private
Cautiously
Giving
Intelligent
Fictitious
Real
General
Diligently
Like
Beings
Conceal
World
Ones
Consumption

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The community is eminently Portuguese - that is to say, it is slow, poor, shiftless, sleepy, and lazy.
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To be great, truly great, you have to be the kind of person who makes the others around you great.
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In literature imitations do not imitate.
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The heart is the real fountain of youth.
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I don't speak German well but several experts have assured me that I write it like an angel. Maybe so, maybe so- I don't know. I've not yet made any acquaintances among the angels. That comes later, whenever it please the Deity. I'm not in any hurry.
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Creed and opinion change with time, and their symbols perish but Literature and its temples are sacred to all creeds and inviolate.
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First catch your Boer, then kick him.
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I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get the same money for cop.
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Does the human being reason? No he thinks, muses, reflects, but does not reason...that is, in the two things which are the peculiar domain of the heart, not the mind, politics and religion. He doesn't want to know the other side. He wants arguments and statistics for his own side, and nothing more.
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We all belong to the nasty stinking little human race, & of course it is not nice for God's beloved vermin to scoff at each other... Oh, we are a nasty little lot-& to think there are people who would like to save us & continue us. It won't happen if I have any influence.
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The weakest of all weak things is a virtue that has not been tested in the fire.
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Cats are the wildest of the tame and the tamest of the wild
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I do not wish any reward but to know I have done the right thing.
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Not a single right is indestructible: a new might can at any time abolish it, hence, man possesses not a single permanent right. God is Might (and He is shifty, malicious, and uncertain).
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Vote: The only commodity that is peddleable without a license.
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Repartee is something we think of twenty-four hours too late.
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isn't so astonishing, the number of things that I can remember, as the number of things I can remember that aren't so.
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Whenever the human race assembles to a number exceeding four, it cannot stand free speech.
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These people´s God has shown them by a million acts that he respects none of the Bible´s statues. He breaks every one of them himself, adultery and all.
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Temperate temperance is best intemperate temperance injures the cause of temperance.
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