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I am not given to exaggeration, and when I say a thing I mean it.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Given
Mean
Thing
Exaggeration

More quotes by Mark Twain

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The law is a system that protects everybody who can afford to hire a good lawyer.
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There has been only one Christian. They caught and curcified him-early.
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We don't care to eat toadstools that think they are truffles.
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Many public-school children seem to know only two dates—1492 and 4th of July and as a rule they don't know what happened on either occasion.
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Doesn't make any difference who we are or what we are, there's always somebody to look down on.
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That is just the way with some people. They get down on a thing when they don’t know nothing about it.
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Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live. To live a fulfilled life, we need to keep creating the what is next, of our lives. Without dreams and goals there is no living, only merely existing, and that is not why we are here.
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Probably there is an imperceptible touch of something permanent that one feels instinctively to adhere to true humour, whereas wit may be the mere conversational shooting up of smartness--a bright feather, to be blown into space the second after it is launched...Wit seems to be counted a very poor relation to Humour....Humour is never artifici
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I couldn't bear to think about it and yet, somehow, I couldn't think about nothing else.
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I do not allow my schooling to interfere with my education
Mark Twain
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The Mississippi River will always have its own way no engineering skill can persuade it to do otherwise.
Mark Twain
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I have been on the verge of being an angel all my life, but it's never happened yet.
Mark Twain
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We are always too busy for our children we never give them the time or interest they deserve. We lavish gifts upon them but the most precious gift, our personal association, which means so much to them, we give grudgingly.
Mark Twain
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This autobiography of mine is a mirror, and I am looking at myself in it all the time. Incidentally I notice the people that pass along at my back - I get glimpses of them in the mirror - and whenever they say or do anything that can help advertise me and flatter me and raise me in my own estimation, I set these things down in my autobiography.
Mark Twain
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The source of all humor is not laughter, but sorrow.
Mark Twain
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I bring you this stately matron named Christendom, returning bedraggled, besmirched, and dishonored from pirate raids in Kiao-Chow, Manchuria, South Africa, and the Phillipines, with her soul full of meanness, her pocket full of boodle, and her mouth full of pious hypocrisies. Give her soap and a towel, but hide the looking-glass.
Mark Twain
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I don't believe any of you have ever read Paradise Lost, and you don't want to. That's something that you just want to take on trust. It's a classic ... something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.
Mark Twain
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Knowledge becomes wisdom only after it has been put to good use.
Mark Twain
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I simply can't resist a cat, particularly a purring one.
Mark Twain
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To string incongruities and absurdities together in a wandering and sometimes purposeless way, and seem innocently unaware that they are absurdities, is the basis of the American art, if my position is correct.
Mark Twain