Quote

Adam and Eve had many advantages, but the principal one was that they escaped teething.

Mark Twain

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Children
Adam
Teeth
Dentistry
Mom
Toothache
Luck
Dental
Advantage
Escaped
Baby
Dentist
Kids
Advantages
Many
Principal

More quotes by Mark Twain

Image
Delicacy - a sad, sad false delicacy - robs literature of the two best things among its belongings: Family-circle narratives & obscene stories.
Mark Twain
Image
And so I am become a knight of the Kingdom of Dreams and Shadows
Mark Twain
Image
What God lacks is convictions- stability of character. He ought to be a Presbyterian or a Catholic or something- not try to be everything.
Mark Twain
Image
India is, the cradle of the human race, the birthplace of human speech, the mother of history, the grandmother of legend, and the great grand mother of tradition. our most valuable and most instructive materials in the history of man are treasured up in India only.
Mark Twain
Image
There ain't anything that is so interesting to look at as a place that a book has talked about.
Mark Twain
Image
Public Servant: Persons chosen by the people to distribute the graft.
Mark Twain
Image
If God is what people say there can be no one in the universe so unhappy as He for He sees unceasingly myriads of His creatures suffering unspeakable miseries--and besides this foresees how they are going to suffer during the remainder of their lives. One might as well say, As unhappy as God.
Mark Twain
Image
I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
Mark Twain
Image
There is nothing more awe-inspiring than a miracle except the credulity that can take it at par.
Mark Twain
Image
Foreigners cannot enjoy our food, I suppose, any more than we can enjoy theirs. It is not strange for tastes are made, not born. I might glorify my bill of fare until I was tired but after all, the Scotchman would shake his head and say, 'Where's your haggis?' and the Fijan would sigh and say, 'Where's your missionary?'
Mark Twain
Image
For we were little Christian children and early learned the value of forbidden fruit.
Mark Twain
Image
I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith. It is wonderful to observe the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.
Mark Twain
Image
It is better to be a young June-bug than an old bird of paradise.
Mark Twain
Image
By law of periodical repetition, everything which has happened once must happen again and again -- and not capriciously, but at regular periods, and each thing in its own period, not another's and each obeying its own law.
Mark Twain
Image
My advice to girls: first, don't smoke - to excess second, don't drink - to excess third, don't marry - to excess.
Mark Twain
Image
But we are all insane, anyway ... The suicides seem to be the only sane people.
Mark Twain
Image
Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
Mark Twain
Image
Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone, you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.
Mark Twain
Image
Epitaphs are cheap, and they do a poor chap a world of good after he is dead, especially if he had hard luck while he was alive. I wish they were used more.
Mark Twain
Image
If we would learn what the human race really is at bottom, we need only observe it in election times.
Mark Twain