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The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Differences
Libertarian
Liberty
Skin
Business
Leaves
Political
Skins
Men
Taxes
Taxidermist
Difference
Libertarianism
Humor
Taxation
Inspiration
Communism
More quotes by Mark Twain
One must travel, to learn. Every day, now, old Scriptural phrases that never possessed any significance for me before, take to themselves a meaning.
Mark Twain
The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money.
Mark Twain
We need not worry so much about what man descends from it's what he descends to that shames the human race.
Mark Twain
There ain't anything that is so interesting to look at as a place that a book has talked about.
Mark Twain
They say that you can't live by bread alone, but I can live on compliments.
Mark Twain
Few things are more irritating than when someone who is wrong is also very effective in making his point.
Mark Twain
To be good is noble but to show others how to be good is nobler and no trouble.
Mark Twain
I was a-trembling, because I'd got to decide, forever, betwixt two things, and I knowed it.
Mark Twain
India has two million gods, and worships them all. In religion all other countries are paupers India is the only millionaire.
Mark Twain
I have been an author for 20 years and an ass for 55.
Mark Twain
When grown-up persons indulge in practical jokes, the fact gauges them. They have lived narrow, obscure, and ignorant lives, and at full manhood they still retain and cherish a job lot of left-over standards and ideals that would have been discarded with their boyhood if they had then moved out into the world and a broader life.
Mark Twain
In my age, as in my youth, night brings me many a deep remorse. I realize that from the cradle up I have been like the rest of the race - never quite sane in the night.
Mark Twain
Only he who has seen better days and lives to see better days again knows their full value.
Mark Twain
There is not an acre of ground on the globe that is in possession of its rightful owner, or that has not been taken away from owner after owner, cycle afer cycle, by force and bloodshed.
Mark Twain
We adore titles and heredities in our hearts and ridicule them with our mouths. This is our democratic privilege.
Mark Twain
When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.
Mark Twain
Circumstance - which moves by laws of its own, regardless of parties and policies, and whose decrees are final and must be obeyed by all - and will be
Mark Twain
Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR per G.G., CHIEF OF ORDNANCE
Mark Twain
One can enjoy a rainbow without necessarily forgetting the forces that made it.
Mark Twain
No throne exists that has a right to exist, and no symbol of it, flying from any flagstaff, is righteously entitled to wear any device but the skull and crossbones of that kindred industry which differs from royalty only businesswise-merely as retail differs from wholesale.
Mark Twain
