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The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Business
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Political
Skins
Men
Taxes
Taxidermist
Difference
Libertarianism
Humor
Taxation
Inspiration
Communism
Differences
Libertarian
Liberty
Skin
More quotes by Mark Twain
The best of us would rather be popular than right.
Mark Twain
Damn these human beings if I had invented them I would go hide my head in a bag.
Mark Twain
I have found out that there ain't no surer way to find out whether you like people or hate them than to travel with them.
Mark Twain
The convention missionaries call modesty has no standard, and cannot have one, because it is opposed to nature and reason and is therefore an artificiality and subject to anybody's whim - anybody's diseased caprice.
Mark Twain
I admire him, I frankly confess it and when his time is come I shall buy a piece of the rope for a keepsake.
Mark Twain
Talent without work is useless, thank God
Mark Twain
All good things arrive unto them that wait - and don't die in the meantime.
Mark Twain
Part of the secret of a success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside.
Mark Twain
The machine has several virtues... One may lean back in his chair and work it. It piles an awful stack of words on one page. It don't muss things or scatter ink blots around.
Mark Twain
Patriotism is merely a religion-love of country, worship of country, devotion to the country's flag and honor and welfare.
Mark Twain
Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat.
Mark Twain
Love is madness, if thwarted it develops fast.
Mark Twain
If there is one thing that will make a man peculiarly and insufferable self-conceited, it is to have his stomach behave itself, the first day at sea, when nearly all his comrades are seasick.
Mark Twain
Are you so unobservant as not to have found out that sanity and happiness are an impossible combination?
Mark Twain
Education: that which reveals to the wise, and conceals from the stupid, the vast limits of their knowledge.
Mark Twain
Among other common lies, we have the silent lie - the deception which one conveys by simply keeping still and concealing the truth. Many obstinate truth-mongers indulge in this dissipation, imagining that if they speak no lie, they lie not at all.
Mark Twain
Explaining humor is a lot like dissecting a frog, you learn a lot in the process, but in the end you kill it.
Mark Twain
Go to bed early, get up early-this is wise.
Mark Twain
Sane and intelligent human beings are like all other human beings, and carefully and cautiously and diligently conceal their private real opinions from the world and give out fictitious ones in their stead for general consumption.
Mark Twain
I prefer milk because I am a Prohibitionist, but I do not go to it for inspiration.
Mark Twain
