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I do not like an injurious lie, except when it injures somebody else.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Except
Somebody
Lying
Else
Like
Injures
Injurious

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Among other common lies, we have the silent lie - the deception which one conveys by simply keeping still and concealing the truth. Many obstinate truth-mongers indulge in this dissipation, imagining that if they speak no lie, they lie not at all.
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The only certainties in life are death and taxes.
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The difference between fiction and nonfiction is that fiction must be absolutely believable.
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A banquet is probably the most fatiguing thing in the world except ditch digging.
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The election makes me think of a story of a man who was dying. He had only two minutes to live, so he sent for a clergyman and asked him, Where is the best place to go to? He was undecided about it. So the minister told him that each place had its advantages--heaven for climate, and hell for society.
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Distance lends enchantment to the view.
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God's great cosmic joke on the human race was requiring that men and women live together in marriage
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Greece is a bleak, unsmiling desert, without agriculture, manufactures or commerce, apparently. What supports its poverty-stricken people or its Government, is a mystery.
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At noon I observed a bevy of nude young native women bathing in the sea, and I went and sat down on their clothes to keep them from being stolen.
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I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.
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That is a society editor, sitting there elegantly dressed, with his legs crossed in that indolent way, observing the clothes the ladies wear, so that he can describe them for his paper and make them out finer than they are and get bribes for it and become wealthy.
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All schools, all colleges have two great functions: to confer, and to conceal valuable knowledge.
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Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
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when we badly want a thing, we go to hunting for good and righteous reasons for it we give it that fine name to comfort our consciences, whereas we privately know we are only hunting for plausible ones.
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My books are like water those of the great geniuses are wine. (Fortunately) everybody drinks water.
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The humorous story is told gravely the teller does his best to conceal the fact that he even dimly suspects that there is anything funny about it.
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They did not know it was impossible so they did it
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The only people who should use the possessive 'we' are kings, newspaper editors, and persons with tapeworms.
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Fortune knocks at every man's door once in a life, but in a good many cases the man is in a neighboring saloon and does not hear her.
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A little starvation can really do more for the average sick man than can the best medicines and the best doctors.
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