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I've lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Actually
Funny
Humorists
Inspirational
Ironic
Happens
Entrepreneur
Things
Humorous
Life
Lived
Terrible
Happened

More quotes by Mark Twain

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Change is the handmaiden Nature requires to do her miracles with.
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You perceive I generalize with intrepidity from single instances. It is the tourist's custom.
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Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
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Children have but little charity for one another's defects
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As a rule, we go about with masks, we go about looking honest, and we are able to conceal ourselves all through the day.
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In literature imitations do not imitate.
Mark Twain
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The test of any good fiction is that you should care something for the characters the good to succeed, the bad to fail. The trouble with most fiction is that you want them all to land in hell, together, as quickly as possible.
Mark Twain
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There is nothing in the world like persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus.
Mark Twain
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It is better to be a young June-bug than an old bird of paradise.
Mark Twain
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Optimist: Person who travels on nothing from nowhere to happiness.
Mark Twain
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What work I have done I have done because it has been play. If it had been work I shouldn't have done it.
Mark Twain
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I pledged myself to smoke but one cigar a day. I kept the cigar waiting until bedtime, then I had a luxurious time with it. But desire persecuted me every day and all day long. I found myself hunting for larger cigars...within the month my cigar had grown to such proportions I could have used it as a crutch.
Mark Twain
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What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey.
Mark Twain
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Every man has a secret ambition: To outsmart horses, fish and women.
Mark Twain
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When someone dies, it is like when your house burns down it isn't for years that you realize the full extent of your loss.
Mark Twain
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To be great, truly great, you have to be the kind of person who makes the others around you great.
Mark Twain
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The holy passion of Friendship is of so sweet and steady and loyal and enduring a nature that it will last through a whole lifetime, if not asked to lend money.
Mark Twain
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Better a broken promise than none at all.
Mark Twain
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A banquet is probably the most fatiguing thing in the world except ditchdigging. It is the insanest of all recreations. The inventor of it overlooked no detail that could furnish weariness, distress, harassment, and acute and long-sustained misery of mind and body.
Mark Twain
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In the Spring, I have counted 136 different kinds of weather inside of 24 hours.
Mark Twain