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Hain't we got all the fools in town on our side? And hain't that a big enough majority in any town?
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Enough
Majority
Fool
Humor
Side
Sides
Huckleberry
Funny
Fools
Bigs
Town
Science
Towns
More quotes by Mark Twain
The old Irish when immersing a babe at baptism left out the right arm so that it would remain pagan for good fighting
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I don't believe there is anything in the whole earth that you can't learn in Berlin except the German language.
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I am always reading immoral books on the sly, and then selfishly trying to prevent other people from having the same wicked good time.
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Lord save us all from a hope tree that has lost the faculty of putting out blossoms.
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Persons attempting to find a motive in this narrative will be prosecuted persons attempting to find a moral in it will be banished persons attempting to find a plot in it will be shot. BY ORDER OF THE AUTHOR per G.G., CHIEF OF ORDNANCE
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Ethical man: A Christian holding four aces.
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I knew a man who grabbed a cat by the tail and learned forty percent more about cats than the man who didn't.
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What a curious kind of fool a girl is. Never been licked in school. What's a licking?
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The cayote is a living, breathing allegory of Want. He is always hungry. He is always poor, out of luck and friendless. The meanest creatures despise him, and even the fleas would desert him for a velocipede.
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Eight grown Americans out of ten dread the coming of the Fourth, with its pandemonium and its perils, and they rejoice when it is gone-if still alive.
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An author values a compliment even when it comes from a source of doubtful competency.
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The common eye sees only the outside of things, and judges by that, but the seeing eye pierces through and reads the heart and the soul, finding there capacities which the outside didn't indicate or promise, and which the other kind of eye couldn't detect.
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When politics enter into municipal government, nothing resulting therefrom in the way of crimes and infamies is then incredible. It actually enables one to accept and believe the impossible.
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Balloon: Thing to take meteroric observations and commit suicide with.
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What a good thing Adam had. When he said a good thing he knew nobody had said it before.
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It is a time when one's spirit is subdued and sad, one knows not why when the past seems a storm-swept desolation, life a vanity and a burden, and the future but a way to death.
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What God lacks is convictions- stability of character. He ought to be a Presbyterian or a Catholic or something- not try to be everything.
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A soiled baby with a neglected nose cannot be conscientiously regarded as a thing of beauty.
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I've come loaded with statistics, for I've noticed that a man can't prove anything without statistics. No man can.
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There is nothing in the world like a persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus and upset the convictions and debauch the emotions of an audience not practiced in the tricks and delusions of oratory
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