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Hain't we got all the fools in town on our side? And hain't that a big enough majority in any town?

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Science
Towns
Enough
Majority
Fool
Humor
Side
Sides
Huckleberry
Funny
Fools
Bigs
Town

More quotes by Mark Twain

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It used to be a good hotel, but that proves nothing - I used to be a good boy.
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Broad, wholesome, charitable views .. can not be acquired by vegetating in one's little corner of the earth.
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You can't reason with your heart it has its own laws, and thumps about things which the intellect scorns.
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Sagebrush is a very fair fuel, but as a vegetable it is a distinguished failure. Nothing can abide the taste of it but the jackass and his illegitimate child the mule.
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I pity the fellow who has to create a dialect or paraphrase the dictionary to get laughs. I can't spell, but I have never stooped to spell cat with a 'k' to get at your funny bone. I love a drink, but I never encouraged drunkenness by harping on its alleged funny side.
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Ethical man: A Christian holding four aces.
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There has been only one Christian. They caught and curcified him-early.
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Civilization largely consists in hiding human nature. When the barbarian learns to hide it we account him enlightened.
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Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
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We have to keep our God placated with prayer, and even then we are never sure of him-how much higher and finer is the Indian's God...Our illogical God is all-powerful in name, but impotent in fact the Great Spirit is not all-powerful, but does the very best he can for his injun and does it free of charge
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Of the delights of this world man cares most for sexual intercourse.
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A person with a new idea is a crank until the idea succeeds.
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It were not best that we should all think alike.
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None but an ass pays a compliment and asks a favour at the same time. There are many asses.
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When politics enter into municipal government, nothing resulting therefrom in the way of crimes and infamies is then incredible. It actually enables one to accept and believe the impossible.
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If the man doesn't believe as we do, we say he is a crank, and that settles it. I mean, it does nowadays, because now we can't burn him.
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Foreigners cannot enjoy our food, I suppose, any more than we can enjoy theirs. It is not strange for tastes are made, not born. I might glorify my bill of fare until I was tired but after all, the Scotchman would shake his head and say, 'Where's your haggis?' and the Fijan would sigh and say, 'Where's your missionary?'
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What God lacks is convictions- stability of character. He ought to be a Presbyterian or a Catholic or something- not try to be everything.
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We Americans... bear the ark of liberties of the world.
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It is so unsatisfactory to read a noble passage and have no one you love at hand to share the happiness with you. And it is unsatisfactory to read to one's self anyhow - for the uttered voice so heightens the expression.
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