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Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
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Autobiographer
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Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
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Heaven
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More quotes by Mark Twain

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Heroine: Girl in a book who is saved from drowning by a hero and marries him next week, but if it was to be over again ten years later it is likely she would rather have a life-belt and he would rather have her have it. Hero: Person in a book who does things which he can't and girl marries him for it.
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If we learned to walk and talk the way we learn to read and write, everyone would limp and stutter.
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Leaving out the gamblers, the burglars, and the plumbers, perhaps we do put our trust in God after a fashion. But, after all, it is an overstatement. If the cholera or black plague should come to these shores, perhaps the bulk of the nation would pray to be delivered from it, but the rest would put their trust in The Health Board.
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Life does not consist mainly - or even largely - of facts and happenings.
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If horses knew their strength we should not ride anymore.
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An author values a compliment even when it comes from a source of doubtful competency.
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Prophesy is a good line of business, but it is full of risks.
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A gentleman is someone who knows how to play the banjo and doesn't.
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One is apt to overestimate beauty when it is rare
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Shut the door not that it lets in the cold but that it lets out the coziness.
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Do something everyday that you don't want to do.
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It is not in the least likely that any life has ever been lived which was not a failure in the secret judgment of the person who lived it.
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Homely truth is unpalatable.
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When I was younger I could remember anything, whether it happened or not.
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My father was an amazing man. The older I got, the smarter he got.
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When your opinions start to coincide with those of the majority, it is time to reconsider your opinions.
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You can have brilliant ideas, but if you can't get them across, your ideas won't get you anywhere. Lee Iacocca Love is the irresistible desire to be irresistibly desired.
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I have no race prejudices, and I think I have no color prejudices or caste prejudices nor creed prejudices. Indeed I know it. I can stand any society. All that I care to know is that a man is a human being-that is enough for me he can't be any worse.
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There are many humorous things in the world among them, the white man's notion that he is less savage than the other savages.
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Broad, wholesome, charitable views .. can not be acquired by vegetating in one's little corner of the earth.
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