Quote

A person that started in to carry a cat home by the tail was gitting knowledge that was always going to be useful to him, and warn't ever going to grow dim or doubtful.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Knowledge
Tail
Home
Tails
Persons
Cat
Person
Useful
Ever
Carry
Going
Grow
Always
Started
Warn
Grows
Doubtful

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God created war so that Americans would learn geography.
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Is the human race a joke? Was it devised and patched together in a dull time when there was nothing important to do?
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The critic's symbol should be the tumble-bug: he deposits his egg in somebody else's dung, otherwise he could not hatch it.
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I admire the serene assurance of those who have religious faith. It is wonderful to observe the calm confidence of a Christian with four aces.
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If we would learn what the human race really is at bottom, we need only observe it in election times.
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His ignorance covers the world like a blanket, and there's scarcely a hole in it anywhere.
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Nothing helps scenery like bacon and eggs.
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Modesty antedates clothes and will be resumed when clothes are no more.
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To write without pay until somebody offers pay. If nobody offers pay within three years, the candidate may look upon this circumstance with the most implicit confidence as the sign that sawing wood is what he was intended for.
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What is the most rigorous law of our being? Growth.
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It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still rolling.
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Don't wait the time is never just right.
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Work is a necessary evil to be avoided.
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Sometimes my feelings are so hot that I have to take the pen and put them out on paper to keep them from setting me afire inside then all that ink and labor are wasted because I can't print the results
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I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- unless he purposely shut the eyes of his mind & keep them shut by force.
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Only kings, presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial 'we.'
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The Germans are exceedingly fond of Rhine wines they are put up in tall, slender bottles, and are considered a pleasant beverage. One tells them from vinegar by the label.
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We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it and stop there lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove lid again and that is well but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore.
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I never made a success of a lecture delivered in a church yet. People are afraid to laugh in a church. They can't be made to do it in any possible way.
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If you have nothing to say, say nothing.
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