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What a good thing Adam had. When he said a good thing he knew nobody had said it before.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Drink
Nobody
Knew
Wisdom
Book
Plagiarism
Thing
Originality
Good
Adam
Beer

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It may be called the Master Passion, the hunger for self-approval.
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The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.
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There is probably no pleasure equal to the pleasure of climbing a dangerous Alp but it is a pleasure which is confined strictly to people who can find pleasure in it.
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Conscience, man's moral medicine chest.
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All emotion is involuntary when genuine.
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The only very marked difference between the average civilized man and the average savage is that the one is gilded and the other is painted.
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None of us can be as great as God, but any of us can be as good.
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The history of our race, and each individual’s experience, are sown thick with evidence that a truth is not hard to kill and that a lie told well is immortal.
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I was exceedingly delighted with the waltz, and also with the polka. These differ in name, but there the difference ceases
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We have to keep our God placated with prayer, and even then we are never sure of him-how much higher and finer is the Indian's God...Our illogical God is all-powerful in name, but impotent in fact the Great Spirit is not all-powerful, but does the very best he can for his injun and does it free of charge
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Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.
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No one can tell me what is a good cigar--for me. I am the only judge... There are no standards--no real standards. Each man's preference is the only standard for him, the only one which he can accept, the only one which can command him.
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Progressive improvement beats delayed perfection.
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A monarch, when good, is entitled to the consideration which we accord to a pirate who keeps Sunday School between crimes when bad, he is entitled to none at all.
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Compliments make me vain: & when I am vain, I am insolent & overbearing. It is a pity, too, because I love compliments. I love them even when they are not so. My child, I can live on a good compliment two weeks with nothing else to eat.
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That is just the way with some people. They get down on a thing when they don’t know nothing about it.
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Few things are more irritating than when someone who is wrong is also very effective in making his point.
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The less there is to justify a traditional custom, the harder it is to get rid of it
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If true, rarely beautiful. If beautiful, rarely true.
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