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I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Taken
Never
Resting
Insomnia
Sleeping
Except
Exercise
Sleep

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Don't go to sleep, so many people die there.
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Are you so unobservant as not to have found out that sanity and happiness are an impossible combination?
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Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising.
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What do you think of the human mind? I mean, in case you think there is a human mind.
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The cat, having sat upon a hot stove lid, will not sit upon a hot stove lid again. Nor upon a cold stove lid.
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The average American's simplest and commonest form of breakfast consists of coffee and beefsteak.
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There are many humorous things in the world among them, the white man's notion that he is less savage than the other savages.
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Stars and shadows ain't good to see by.
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Do something everyday that you don't want to do.
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The more things are forbidden, the more popular they become.
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There are some few people I respect and admire, but I don't think much of the species.
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When the Lord finished the world, he pronounced it good. That is what I said about my first work, too. But Time, I tell you, Time takes the confidence out of these incautious opinions. It is more than likely that He thinks about the world, now, pretty much as I think about the Innocents Abroad. The fact is, there is a trifle too much water in both.
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Love is not a product of reasonings and statistics. It just comes-none knows whence-and cannot explain itself.
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A person who won't read has no advantage over one who can't read.
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The fear of lightning is one of the most distressing infirmities a human being can be afflicted with. It is mostly confined to women, but now and then you find it in a little dog, and sometimes a man.
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There is a sumptuous variety about the New England weather... In the spring I have counted one hundred and twenty-six different kinds of weather inside of four and twenty hours.
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Man is a Religious Animal. He is the only Religious Animal. He is the only animal that has the True Religion - several of them.
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Two days overdue, THE WORLD'S WORK has not reached me. Pray make a note of this. I would rather not have to resort to violence.
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Men are easily dealt with--but when you get the women started, you are in for it, you know.
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I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it.
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