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There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
History
Farce
Art
Finish
Human
Hang
Humans
Philosophy
Whole
Humanity
Would
Animal
Like
Race
Times

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It is so unsatisfactory to read a noble passage and have no one you love at hand to share the happiness with you. And it is unsatisfactory to read to one's self anyhow - for the uttered voice so heightens the expression.
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Don't just sit there and worry. Be proactive. Do something - anything - about what's worrying you so you can gain information, focus and control over the situation. I've suffered a great many catastrophes in my life. Most of them never happened.
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When people do not respect us we are sharply offended yet in his private heart no man much respects himself.
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Tough times teach trust.
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There's some human instinct which makes a man treasure what he is not to make any use of, because everybody does not possess it.
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The most interesting information comes from children, for they tell all they know and then stop.
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We Americans are the most lavish and showiest and most luxury loving people on the earth and at our masthead we fly one true and honest symbol, the gaudiest flag the world has ever seen.
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What is the most rigorous law of our being? Growth.
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Plain question and plain answer make the shortest road out of most perplexities.
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Who knows, he may grow up to be President someday, unless they hang him first! Aunt Polly about Tom Sawyer
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If there is one thing that is really cheerful in the world, it is cheerfulness. I have noticed it often. And I have noticed that when a man is right down cheerful, he is seldom unhappy for the time being. Such is the nature of man.
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You can't make a life over. Society wouldn't let you if you would.
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The government is merely a servant―merely a temporary servant it cannot be its prerogative to determine what is right and what is wrong, and decide who is a patriot and who isn't. Its function is to obey orders, not originate them.
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You can't pray a lie -- I found that out.
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There is only one good sex. The female one.
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There is nothing in the world like a persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus and upset the convictions and debauch the emotions of an audience not practiced in the tricks and delusions of oratory
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...heaven for climate, and hell for society.
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Circumstance - which moves by laws of its own, regardless of parties and policies, and whose decrees are final and must be obeyed by all - and will be
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Prediction is difficult- particularly when it involves the future.
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