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I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Didn
Promptly
Able
Answer
Humor
Learning
Answers
Knowledge
Funny
Inspirational
Gratified

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My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.
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I respect a man who knows how to spell a word more than one way.
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Children are natural mimics who act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.
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The past does not repeat itself, but it rhymes.
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The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.
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The ignorant are afraid to betray surprise or admiration...they think it ill manners.
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But it warn't no time to be sentimentering.
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There is no security in life, only opportunity.
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Compliments make me vain: & when I am vain, I am insolent & overbearing. It is a pity, too, because I love compliments. I love them even when they are not so. My child, I can live on a good compliment two weeks with nothing else to eat.
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In the ancient city of London, on a certain autumn day in the second quarter of the sixteenth century, a boy was born to a poor family of the name of Canty, who did not want him.
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The dog is a gentleman I hope to go to his heaven not man's.
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Let us be grateful to Adam: he cut us out of the blessing of idleness and won for us the curse of labor.
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Each man is afraid of his neighbor's disapproval - a thing which, to the general run of the human race, is more dreaded than wolves and death.
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We are strange beings, we seem to go free, but we go in chains - chains of training, custom, convention, association, environment - in a word, Circumstance, and against these bonds the strongest of us struggle in vain.
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Thanksgiving Day - Let all give humble, hearty, and sincere thanks, now, but the turkeys. In the island of Fiji they do not use turkeys, they use plumbers. It does not become you and me to sneer at Fiji.
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Once I talked to the inmates of an insane asylum in Hartford. I have talked to idiots a thousand times, but only once to the insane.
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Often a quite assified remark becomes sanctified by use and petrified by custom it is then a permanency, its term of activity a geologic period.
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History has tried hard to teach us that we can't have good government under politicians. Now, to go and stick one at the very head of the government couldn't be wise.
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I like Joan of Arc best of all my books and it is the best I know it perfectly well.
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There was never yet an uninteresting life. Such a thing is an impossibility. Inside of the dullest exterior there is a drama, a comedy, and a tragedy.
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