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The more you explain it, the more I don't understand it.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Vaccines
Explain
Language
Understand

More quotes by Mark Twain

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If you do read the newspaper you are misinformed.
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Fortune knocks at every man's door once in a life, but in a good many cases the man is in a neighboring saloon and does not hear her.
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Damn these human beings if I had invented them I would go hide my head in a bag.
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When a man's dog turns against hime, it is time for his wife to pack her trunk and go home to mamma.
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When the world is made to be idiot-proof, the world will become overpopulated with idiots.
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Optimist: Person who travels on nothing from nowhere to happiness.
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You try to tell me anything about the newspaper business! Sir, I have been through it from Alpha to Omaha, and I tell you that the less a man knows the bigger the noise he makes and the higher the salary he commands.
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The best of us would rather be popular than right.
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Customs do not concern themselves with right or wrong or reason. But they have to be obeyed one reasons all around them until he is tired, but he must not transgress them, it is sternly forbidden.
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....try the mustard, - a man can't know what turnips are in perfection without mustard.
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Explaining humor is a lot like dissecting a frog, you learn a lot in the process, but in the end you kill it.
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Hardly a man in the world has an opinion upon morals, political, or religion which he got otherwise than through his associations and sympathies.
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Annihilation has no terrors for me, because I have already tried it before I was born --a hundred million years --and I have suffered more in an hour, in this life, than I remember to have suffered in the whole hundred million years put together.
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The laws of Nature take precedence of all human laws. The purpose of all human laws is one - to defeat the laws of Nature. This is the case among all the nations, both civilized and savage. It is a grotesquerie, but when the human race is not grotesque it is because it is asleep and losing its opportunity.
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All gentle cant and philosophizing to the contrary notwithstanding, no people in this world ever did achieve their freedom by goody-goody talk and moral suasion: it being immutable law that all revolutions that will succeed, must begin in blood.
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How little a thing can make us happy when we feel that we have earned it.
Mark Twain
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If I cannot smoke in heaven, then I shall not go.
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If you tell the truth you do not need a good memory!
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Etiquette requires us to admire the human race.
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The cat, having sat upon a hot stove lid, will not sit upon a hot stove lid again. Nor upon a cold stove lid.
Mark Twain