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Everything human is pathetic. The secret source of humor itself is not joy but sorrow. There is no humor in heaven.
Mark Twain
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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Secret
Literature
Heaven
Equator
Happiness
Pathetic
Human
Sorrow
Everything
Source
Humans
Humor
Joy
More quotes by Mark Twain
I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know.
Mark Twain
If I can capture truth in its simplest form, beauty will follow like a sledgehammer.
Mark Twain
Between us, we cover all knowledge he knows all that can be known and I know the rest.
Mark Twain
Kindness is the language which the deaf can hear and the blind can see.
Mark Twain
When an honest writer discovers an imposition it is his simple duty to strip it bare and hurl it down from its place of honor, no matter who suffers by it any other course would render him unworthy of the public confidence.
Mark Twain
Frankenstein took some flesh and bones and blood and made a man out of them the man ran away and fell to raping and robbing and murdering everywhere, and Frankenstein was horrified and in despair, and said, I made him, without asking his consent, and it makes me responsible for every crime he commits. I am the criminal, he is innocent.
Mark Twain
When the time comes that a man has had his dinner, then the true man comes to the surface
Mark Twain
Gratitude is a debt which usually goes on accumulating like blackmail the more you pay, the more is exacted.
Mark Twain
The easy confidence with which I know another man's religion is folly teaches me to suspect that my own is also.
Mark Twain
Man will do many things to get himself loved, he will do all things to get himself envied.
Mark Twain
The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopt.
Mark Twain
All the territorial possessions of all the political establishments in the earth--including America, of course-- consist of pilferings from other people's wash. No tribe, howsoever insignificant, and no nation, howsoever mighty occupies a foot of land that was not stolen.
Mark Twain
The modern patriotism, the true patriotism, the only rational patriotism is loyalty to the Nation all the time, loyalty to the Government when it deserves it.
Mark Twain
Hain't we got all the fools in town on our side? And hain't that a big enough majority in any town?
Mark Twain
The proverb says, Born lucky, always lucky, and I am very superstitious. As a small boy I was notoriously lucky. It was usual for one or two of our lads (per annum) to get drowned in the Mississippi or in Bear Creek, but I was pulled out in a 2/3 drowned condition 9 times before I learned to swim, and was considered to be a cat in disguise.
Mark Twain
In India, 'cold weather' is merely a conventional phrase and has come into use through the necessity of having some way to distinguish between weather which will melt a brass door-knob and weather which will only make it mushy.
Mark Twain
The dog is a gentleman I hope to go to his heaven not man's.
Mark Twain
It is the will of God that we must have critics and missionaries and congressmen and humorists, and we must bear the burden
Mark Twain
Marriage -- yes, it is the supreme felicity of life. I concede it. And it is also the supreme tragedy of life. The deeper the love the surer the tragedy. And the more disconsolating when it comes.
Mark Twain
Loyalty to petrified opinion never yet broke a chain or freed a human soul.
Mark Twain
