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I've never let my school interfere with my education.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
School
Never
Graduation
Interfere
Learning
Education
Religion
Inspirational

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What a world of trouble those who never marry escape! There are many happy matches, it is true, and sometimes my dear, and my love come from the heart but what sensible bachelor, rejoicing in his freedom and years of discretion, will run the tremendous risk?
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You can't no more teach what you ain't learned than you can come from where you ain't been.
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it is not wise to keep the fire going under a slander unless you can get some large advantage out of keeping it alive. Few slanders can stand the wear of silence.
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To me [Edgar Allen Poe's] prose is unreadable—like Jane Austin's [sic]. No there is a difference. I could read his prose on salary, but not Jane's. Jane is entirely impossible. It seems a great pity that they allowed her to die a natural death.
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Love seems the swiftest, but it is the slowest of growths
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The only people who should use the possessive 'we' are kings, newspaper editors, and persons with tapeworms.
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Never knew before what eternity was made for. It is to give some of us a chance to learn German.
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God puts something good and loveable in every man His hands create.
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If I can capture truth in its simplest form, beauty will follow like a sledgehammer.
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There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate: when he can't afford it, and when he can.
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There are two types of speakers: those that are nervous and those that are liars.
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Life should begin with age and its privileges and accumulations, and end with youth and its capacity to splendidly enjoy such advantages.
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Give a man a reputation as an early riser and he can sleep 'til noon.
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Italy is the home of art and swindling home of religion and moral rottenness
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Troubles are only mental it is the mind that manufactures them, and the mind can gorge them, banish them, abolish them.
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Intellectual ''work'' is misnamed it is a pleasure, a dissipation, and is its own highest reward.
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The reason why truth is so much stranger than fiction is that there is no requirement for it to be consistent.
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Conductor, when you receive a fare, Punch in the presence of the passenjare. A blue trip slip for an eight-cent fare, A buff trip slip for a six-cent fare, A pink trip slip for a three-cent fare, Punch in the presence of the passenjare! Punch, brothers! punch with care! Punch in the presence of the passenjare!
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English humor is hard to appreciate, though, unless you are trained to it. The English papers, in reporting my speeches, always put 'laughter' in the wrong place.
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If the man doesn't believe as we do, we say he is a crank, and that settles it. I mean, it does nowadays, because now we can't burn him.
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