Quote

If it's your job to eat a frog, it's best to do it first thing in the morning. And If it's your job to eat two frogs, it's best to eat the biggest one first.

Mark Twain

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Two
Best
Firsts
First
Frog
Thing
Frogs
Biggest
Morning
Jobs

More quotes by Mark Twain

Image
You cannot have all chiefs you gotta have Indians too. Perfect love cannot be without equality. A friend to everybody and to nobody is the same thing. We are all alike, on the inside.
Mark Twain
Image
The master minds of all nations, in all ages, have sprung in affluent multitude from the mass of the nations, and from the mass of the nation only-not from its privileged classes.
Mark Twain
Image
Only kings, presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial 'we.'
Mark Twain
Image
We love old travelers: we love to hear them prate, drivel and lie we love them for their asinine vanity, their ability to bore, their luxuriant fertility of imagination, their startling, brilliant, overwhelming mendacity.
Mark Twain
Image
Be virtuous and you will be eccentric.
Mark Twain
Image
The cat, having sat upon a hot stove lid, will not sit upon a hot stove lid again. Nor upon a cold stove lid.
Mark Twain
Image
I am dead to adverbs they cannot excite me. To misplace an adverb is a thing which I am able to do with frozen indifference it can never give me a pang. There are subtleties which I cannot master at all - they confuse me, they mean absolutely nothing to me - and this adverb plague is one of them.
Mark Twain
Image
Every year you wait, long ago gets farther away.
Mark Twain
Image
Many a small thing has been made large by the right kind of advertising.
Mark Twain
Image
Behind every successful man, there is a woman - And behind every unsuccessful man, there are two.
Mark Twain
Image
It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it.
Mark Twain
Image
The old man laughed loud and joyously, shook up the details of his anatomy from head to foot, and ended by saying that such a laugh was money in a man's pocket, because it cut down the doctor's bills like everything.
Mark Twain
Image
Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.
Mark Twain
Image
I bring you this stately matron named Christendom, returning bedraggled, besmirched, and dishonored from pirate raids in Kiao-Chow, Manchuria, South Africa, and the Phillipines, with her soul full of meanness, her pocket full of boodle, and her mouth full of pious hypocrisies. Give her soap and a towel, but hide the looking-glass.
Mark Twain
Image
There are several kinds of stories, but only one difficult kind-the humorous.
Mark Twain
Image
Religion consists in a set of things which the average man thinks he believes and wishes he was certain of.
Mark Twain
Image
Let your secret sympathies and your compassion be always with the under dog in the fight -- this is magnanimity but bet on the other one -- this is business.
Mark Twain
Image
If I can capture truth in its simplest form, beauty will follow like a sledgehammer.
Mark Twain
Image
In God We Trust. It is the choicest compliment that has ever been paid us, and the most gratifying to our feelings. It is simple, direct, gracefully phrased it always sounds well - In God We Trust. I don't believe it would sound any better if it were true.
Mark Twain
Image
Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement.
Mark Twain