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What a wee little part of a person's life are his acts and his words! His real life is led in his head, and is known to none but himself.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Little
Head
Real
Literature
Life
Known
Words
Part
Littles
Persons
Acts
Person
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More quotes by Mark Twain

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We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it - and stop there.
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The reason why truth is so much stranger than fiction is that there is no requirement for it to be consistent.
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The radical of one century is the conservative of the next. The radical invents the views. When he has worn them out, the conservative adopt.
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[On Dutch flat poetry]: It is too smooth and blubbery it reads like butter-milk gurgling from a jug.
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Consider the average intelligence of the common man, then realize 50% are even stupider.
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Foreigners cannot enjoy our food, I suppose, any more than we can enjoy theirs. It is not strange for tastes are made, not born. I might glorify my bill of fare until I was tired but after all, the Scotchman would shake his head and say, 'Where's your haggis?' and the Fijan would sigh and say, 'Where's your missionary?'
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Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.
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I could forgive the boy, now, if he'd committed a million sins!
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The dog is a gentleman I hope to go to his heaven not man's.
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There's always a hole in theories somewhere if you look close enough.
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A banquet is probably the most fatiguing thing in the world except ditch digging.
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Education: that which reveals to the wise, and conceals from the stupid, the vast limits of their knowledge.
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Jane Austen's books, too, are absent from this library. Just that one omission alone would make a fairly good library out of a library that hadn't a book in it.
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To forget pain is to be painless to forget care is to be rid of it to go abroad is to accomplish both.
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...there isn't often anything in Wagner opera that one would call by such a violent name as acting.
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...Man is a marvelous curiosity. When he is at his very very best he is a sort of low grade nickel-plated angel at his worst he is unspeakable, unimaginable and first and last and all the time he is a sarcasm. Yet he blandly and in all sincerity calls himself the 'noblest work of God.'
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Is the human race a joke? Was it devised and patched together in a dull time when there was nothing important to do?
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I was a-trembling, because I'd got to decide, forever, betwixt two things, and I knowed it.
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Those who do not read have no advantage over those who cannot read.
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Politicians and diapers must be changed often, and for the same reason.
Mark Twain