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Good friends, good books and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.

Mark Twain

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Mark Twain
Age: 74 †
Born: 1835
Born: November 30
Died: 1910
Died: April 21
Aphorist
Author
Autobiographer
Humorist
Journalist
Novelist
Opinion Journalist
Prosaist
Science Fiction Writer
Teacher
Florida
Missouri
Samuel Langhorne Clemens
Samuel L. Clemens
Samuel Clemens
Books
Ironic
Reading
Contentment
Friends
Ideal
Funny
Satisfied
Book
Ideals
Good
Conscience
Life
Friendship
Inspiration
Sleepy

More quotes by Mark Twain

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I wrote 'Tom Sawyer' and 'Huck Finn' for adults exclusively, and it always distressed me when I find that boys and girls have been allowed access to them. The mind that becomes soiled in youth can never again be washed clean.
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The North thinks it knows how to make corn bread, but this is a gross superstition. Perhaps no bread in the world is quite as good as Southern corn bread, and perhaps no bread in the world is quite as bad as the Northern imitation of it.
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I have always been rather better treated in San Francisco than I actually deserved.
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[I] shall never use profanity except in discussing house rent and taxes. Indeed, upon second thought, I will not use it then, for it is unchristian, inelegant, and degrading--though to speak truly I do not see how house rent and taxes are going to be discussed worth a cent without it.
Mark Twain
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I never write Metropolis for seven cents because I can get the same price for city. I never write policeman because I can get the same money for cop.
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The only certainties in life are death and taxes.
Mark Twain
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When I want to read something nice, I sit down and write it myself.
Mark Twain
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We despise all reverences and all objects of reverence which are outside the pale of our list of sacred things. And yet, with strange inconsistency, we are shocked when other people despise and defile the things which are holy to us.
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There is no security in life, only opportunity.
Mark Twain
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I have done more for San Francisco than any of its old residents. Since I left there it has increased in population fully 300,000. I could have done more - I could have gone earlier - it was suggested.
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Prophesy is a good line of business, but it is full of risks.
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And so when I couldn't stand it no longer, I lit out. I got into my old rags and my sugar-hogshead again, and was free and satisfied.
Mark Twain
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There are times when one would like to hang the whole human race, and finish the farce.
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For all the talk you hear about knowledge being such a wonderful thing, instinct is worth forty of it for real unerringness.
Mark Twain
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Nothing is so ignorant as a man's left hand, except a lady's watch.
Mark Twain
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It's an epitome of life. The first half of it consists of the capacity to enjoy without the chance the last half consists of the chance without the capacity.
Mark Twain
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Men are like bank accounts. The more money, the more interest they generate.
Mark Twain
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He had only one vanity he thought he could give advice better than any other person.
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Everybody lies...every day, every hour, awake, asleep, in his dreams, in his joy, in his mourning. If he keeps his tongue still his hands, his feet, his eyes, his attitude will convey deception.
Mark Twain
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The low level which commercial morality has reached in America is deplorable. We have humble God fearing Christian men among us who will stoop to do things for a million dollars that they ought not to be willing to do for less than 2 millions.
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