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Unlike celibacy, which people choose, asexuality is an intrinsic part of who we are.

Mallory Ortberg

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Mallory Ortberg
Unlike
Choose
Part
People
Celibacy
Intrinsic

More quotes by Mallory Ortberg

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The hardest part about being ghosted is the fact that you can't deal with the ghoster directly. You just never hear from them again, and everything feels odd and incomplete.
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There are alternatives to pregnancy if you want another child.
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It should go without saying that you are not doing anything wrong by having sex in your own home, and based on the care you've taken to keep things relatively quiet it's unlikely that you're violating any city noise ordinances.
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Asexuality does not make our lives any worse or any better, we just face a different set of challenges than most sexual people.
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I'm of the opinion that it is always a kind and appropriate decision to get in touch with someone who's lost a loved one to remind them that you're thinking of them and have fond memories of the deceased.
Mallory Ortberg
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You have a right to be treated professionally at work, and it's your supervisor's job to make sure all their employees can perform their duties comfortably and safely.
Mallory Ortberg
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You can't prevent a possible future closeness between your upcoming child and one or more of their grandparents.
Mallory Ortberg
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It is so tempting to return rudeness with rudeness!
Mallory Ortberg
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Someone who responds to Please don't grope me with whining and pouting isn't a friend. He's an asshole and a predator.
Mallory Ortberg
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The mere idea of asking a family member if they intentionally stopped sending me an annual bonus makes me feel like breaking out in hives.
Mallory Ortberg
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To stop challenging someone from using anti-gay language simply because they persist in using anti-gay language strikes me as a defeatist approach.
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We are all going to die, sometimes even in the middle of a lease.
Mallory Ortberg
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Letting events end is not rude. Everything ends.
Mallory Ortberg
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You don't need to hide the fact that you're in recovery, but you don't have to share your history of addiction with acquaintances at work, either.
Mallory Ortberg
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If just one person touches you without your permission, stepping back and saying clearly, Please don't touch me should get them to stop.
Mallory Ortberg
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There are few things more disconcerting than realizing the first date you thought went so well was in fact a dud.
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Five-foot-8 is a perfectly normal height for a woman - it's slightly but not at all unusually tall and certainly shouldn't be causing you any torment.
Mallory Ortberg
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In no state in America is it legal for a landlord to demand their tenants lead a healthy lifestyle in order to rent property.
Mallory Ortberg
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Depression cannot be overcome by listing a series of good things in one's life, any more than a broken foot can be healed by thinking about all the other bones you have that aren't broken.
Mallory Ortberg
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Some struggling marriages can be salvaged with hard work and counseling others should be dismantled and stripped for parts.
Mallory Ortberg