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It should go without saying that you are not doing anything wrong by having sex in your own home, and based on the care you've taken to keep things relatively quiet it's unlikely that you're violating any city noise ordinances.
Mallory Ortberg
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More quotes by Mallory Ortberg
There are alternatives to pregnancy if you want another child.
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Acting politely in front of someone black and/or gay and then making horrible claims about their intelligence or worth as human beings after they leave the room is not kindness - it's hypocrisy.
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One of the glorious things about being a person in the world is that you don't have to worry about whether or not someone else is trying to be creepy.
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Many fathers go their entire lives without announcing how sexy their son's old girlfriends are.
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There are few things more disconcerting than realizing the first date you thought went so well was in fact a dud.
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Letting events end is not rude. Everything ends.
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To stop challenging someone from using anti-gay language simply because they persist in using anti-gay language strikes me as a defeatist approach.
Mallory Ortberg
In no state in America is it legal for a landlord to demand their tenants lead a healthy lifestyle in order to rent property.
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I hate to get gender essentialist, but I'm starting to think that a lot of married men have some sort of heterosexually induced dentistry aversion.
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Worrying seems like a fairly natural state of being for a parent, so feel free to worry as much as you want.
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It's so difficult to figure out how to offer support and also be honest with someone you love who's in a damaging relationship without making them feel defensive and retreating even further into isolation.
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It's OK to tell your partner to objectify you. That's part of the fun of having a partner.
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There's simply no way you can tell a woman you work with that you disapprove of her relationship with her adult child, no matter how much you think it would be better for him to move out.
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Anyone who wants to pretend that your Huntington's disease is an invention is someone who does not have your best interests at heart.
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I don't think unfriending your old crush on Facebook will do much other than remove him from your Facebook feed. Don't beat yourself up over what you dream about there are a lot worse things that could slip across the transom of your unconscious mind than an old high school crush who was always nice to you.
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I agree that biphobia is real, but I think it's absolutely worth considering that someone who despises having sex with her husband - and men in general - may not be interested in men sexually.
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If your partner asks you if something bothers you, and something bothers you, the best thing you can do is say, Yes, it bothers me. Otherwise you create a situation where they think everything is fine, continue with the offending behavior, while you build up a secret reservoir of resentment that will eventually come pouring out, to their shock
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Reconciliation is not possible when one party asks the other to obliterate all signs of their relationship.
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