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I don't know of any way to control the subject of one's dreams although I'm fairly certain there are more than a few types of psychoanalysis dedicated to the topic.

Mallory Ortberg

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Mallory Ortberg
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Control
Fairly
Dream
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Certain
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Although
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Psychoanalysis
Dreams
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There's simply no way you can tell a woman you work with that you disapprove of her relationship with her adult child, no matter how much you think it would be better for him to move out.
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If you don't like potlucks, the solution to your problem is don't go to potlucks, not insist other people don't have them.
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I don't think unfriending your old crush on Facebook will do much other than remove him from your Facebook feed. Don't beat yourself up over what you dream about there are a lot worse things that could slip across the transom of your unconscious mind than an old high school crush who was always nice to you.
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Letting events end is not rude. Everything ends.
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Depression cannot be overcome by listing a series of good things in one's life, any more than a broken foot can be healed by thinking about all the other bones you have that aren't broken.
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You need to be able to express your resentment and sense of loss in a way that doesn't damage your partner.
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Some people give gifts in order to bewilder, confuse, and manipulate their recipients.
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I hate to get gender essentialist, but I'm starting to think that a lot of married men have some sort of heterosexually induced dentistry aversion.
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It can't hurt to have a backup.
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Reciprocating oral sex is, in general, a very good idea!
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Tenancy laws can be so complicated I want to make sure OP is protected as much as possible.
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As you feel increasingly comfortable around your friends, I think it's more than fine to share the basic details of your heroin addiction with them. If they seem receptive, you can feel free to talk about it in further detail if they seem judgmental or uncomfortable, you can move on to other topics.
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If your partner asks you if something bothers you, and something bothers you, the best thing you can do is say, Yes, it bothers me. Otherwise you create a situation where they think everything is fine, continue with the offending behavior, while you build up a secret reservoir of resentment that will eventually come pouring out, to their shock
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It should go without saying that you are not doing anything wrong by having sex in your own home, and based on the care you've taken to keep things relatively quiet it's unlikely that you're violating any city noise ordinances.
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Someone who responds to Please don't grope me with whining and pouting isn't a friend. He's an asshole and a predator.
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Nothing good comes of reading other people's emails.
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If just one person touches you without your permission, stepping back and saying clearly, Please don't touch me should get them to stop.
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It's OK to tell your partner to objectify you. That's part of the fun of having a partner.
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Diapers do not belong on the same table as food.
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I'm pretty sure there's no sexuality that justifies constant low-level harassment.
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