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If you don't like potlucks, the solution to your problem is don't go to potlucks, not insist other people don't have them.

Mallory Ortberg

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Mallory Ortberg
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More quotes by Mallory Ortberg

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Don't badger people without children into admitting the secret desire for children you're sure they have to you! Don't badger anyone! Leave the badgering to the badgers.
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Most of us, however committed we are to our ideals, will find ourselves every now and again reading an attention-grabbing headline from the Daily Mail or some other lowest-common denominator. That's not the same thing as frequenting a site like the white supremacist Stormfront.
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We are all going to die, sometimes even in the middle of a lease.
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I agree that biphobia is real, but I think it's absolutely worth considering that someone who despises having sex with her husband - and men in general - may not be interested in men sexually.
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You can care very much about someone without being capable of becoming their primary caregiver in the event of their parents' untimely death.
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There are few things more disconcerting than realizing the first date you thought went so well was in fact a dud.
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Some struggling marriages can be salvaged with hard work and counseling others should be dismantled and stripped for parts.
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As you feel increasingly comfortable around your friends, I think it's more than fine to share the basic details of your heroin addiction with them. If they seem receptive, you can feel free to talk about it in further detail if they seem judgmental or uncomfortable, you can move on to other topics.
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It is so tempting to return rudeness with rudeness!
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I'm of the belief that dating potential is almost always an exercise in frustration.
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Asexuality does not make our lives any worse or any better, we just face a different set of challenges than most sexual people.
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You can't prevent a possible future closeness between your upcoming child and one or more of their grandparents.
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You need to be able to express your resentment and sense of loss in a way that doesn't damage your partner.
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Not wanting to give everyone in your life one of your kidneys is not the same thing as hoping they die of kidney failure.
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I'm pretty sure there's no sexuality that justifies constant low-level harassment.
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I don't think it's a requirement that a happy, fulfilling relationship also provide the best sex of all time.
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A woman who repeatedly asks a man she knows to be gay when he's going to get married and have children is not trying to let sleeping dogs lie.
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If just one person touches you without your permission, stepping back and saying clearly, Please don't touch me should get them to stop.
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Enjoy your relationship with your boyfriend and don't worry about the people or situations you dream about. Once you wake up, they're over let them go.
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Someone who has a disability is not necessarily in distress. You may be embarrassing and inconveniencing someone by butting in and making assumptions.
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