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Hiring someone to write your autobiography is like hiring someone to take a bath for you

Mae West

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Mae West
Age: 87 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 17
Died: 1980
Died: November 22
Actor
Actress
Autobiographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Playwright
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Writer
Brooklyn
New York
Mary Jane West
Jane West
Autobiography
Inspiration
Write
Someone
Take
Writing
Bath
Like
Baths
Hiring

More quotes by Mae West

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A dame that knows the ropes isn't likely to get tied up.
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Love isn't an emotion or an instinct - it's an art.
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It isn't what I do, but how I do it. It isn't what I say, but how I say it, and how I look when I do it and say it.
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She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.
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Sometimes I don't drink so the next day I can remember having fun.
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I always did like a man in uniform. And that one fits you grand. Why don't you come up sometime and see me?
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Girls, give all your gentlemen friends an even break, even if you have to break them in the attempt.
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I only have 'yes' men around me. Who needs 'no' men?
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Men are my life, diamonds are my career.
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I have always felt a gift diamond shines so much better than one you buy for yourself.
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An ounce of performance is worth pounds of promises.
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In my long and colorful career, one thing stands out: I have been misunderstood.
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When it comes to finances, remember that there are no withholding taxes on the wages of sin.
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Sex with love is the greatest thing in life. But sex without love--that's not so bad either.
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Woman: You certainly know the way to a man's heart. Mae West: Funny, too, 'cause I don't know how to cook.
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My advice to those who think they have to take off their clothes to be a star is, once you're boned, what's left to create the illusion? Let em wonder. I never believed in giving them too much of me.
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I believe in censorship. I made a fortune out of it.
Mae West
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[On the metaphysical:] ... I knew in some marvelous way I had touched the hem of the unknown. And being me, I wanted to lift that hemline a little bit more.
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Imagine censors that wouldn't let you sit in a man's lap. I've been in more laps than a napkin!
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Diamonds talk, and I can stand listenin' to 'em often.
Mae West