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I've been in more laps than a napkin.

Mae West

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Mae West
Age: 87 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 17
Died: 1980
Died: November 22
Actor
Actress
Autobiographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Playwright
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Writer
Brooklyn
New York
Mary Jane West
Jane West
Funny
Napkin
Laps
Napkins
Lap
Sarcastic
Witty
Humorous

More quotes by Mae West

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Girls, give all your gentlemen friends an even break, even if you have to break them in the attempt.
Mae West
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I have never been able to sleep with anyone. I require a full-size bed so that I can lie in the middle of it and extend my arms spreadeagle on both sides without being obstructed.
Mae West
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I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
Mae West
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His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.
Mae West
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When I'm good, I'm very good. But when I'm bad I'm better.
Mae West
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Positive thoughts generate positive feelings and attract positive life experiences. You only live once, but if you do it right, once is enough.
Mae West
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Women like a man with a past, but they prefer a man with a present
Mae West
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Is that a pistol in your pocket or are you just glad to see me? (She made this remark in February 1936, at the railway station in Los Angeles upon her return from Chicago, when a Los Angeles police officer was assigned to escort her home)
Mae West
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Dennis Thatcher, husband of Margaret Thatcher, when asked who wore the pants in his house, said I do, and I also wash and iron them. I only like two kinds of men domestic and foreign.
Mae West
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Goodness, what beautiful diamonds!' 'Goodness had nothing to do with it'.
Mae West
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what's life good fer anyhow? The minute you crawl into the world for no good reason of yer own, it's got you licked four ways from the ace.
Mae West
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Never ask a man where he has been.
Mae West
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I always say, keep a diary and someday it'll keep you.
Mae West
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I have always felt a gift diamond shines so much better than one you buy for yourself.
Mae West
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Marriage is like a book. The whole story takes place between the covers.
Mae West
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I believe in the single standard -- for men and women.
Mae West
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Just a little sheep dip. Panacea for all stomach ailments.
Mae West
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Sometimes I don't drink so the next day I can remember having fun.
Mae West
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I'm no angel, but I've spread my wings a bit.
Mae West
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Don't come crawlin' to a man for love-he likes to get a run for his money.
Mae West