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His mother should have thrown him away and kept the stork.

Mae West

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Mae West
Age: 87 †
Born: 1893
Born: August 17
Died: 1980
Died: November 22
Actor
Actress
Autobiographer
Comedian
Film Actor
Playwright
Screenwriter
Singer
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Writer
Brooklyn
New York
Mary Jane West
Jane West
Mother
Life
Stork
Storks
Thrown
Kept
Mom
Away

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I have never been able to sleep with anyone. I require a full-size bed so that I can lie in the middle of it and extend my arms spreadeagle on both sides without being obstructed.
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I don't like myself, I'm crazy about myself.
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A man has one hundred dollars and you leave him with two dollars, that's subtraction.
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It's not what you say, but how you say it!
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Everyone has the right to run his own life- even if you're heading for a crash. What I'm against is blind flying.
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I have never loved a man as much as I have loved myself
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When it comes to finances, remember that there are no withholding taxes on the wages of sin.
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I'm no angel, but I've spread my wings a bit.
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All the raves were just words. You don't want to let words confuse you. Words come cheap.
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The bite of existence did not cut into one in Hollywood.
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Woman: You certainly know the way to a man's heart. Mae West: Funny, too, 'cause I don't know how to cook.
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Just a little sheep dip. Panacea for all stomach ailments.
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She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong.
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Love isn't an emotion or an instinct - it's an art.
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March isn't the only thing that's in like a lion and out like a lamb.
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Too many girls follow the line of least resistance, but a good line is hard to resist.
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My advice to those who think they have to take off their clothes to be a star is, once you're boned, what's left to create the illusion? Let em wonder. I never believed in giving them too much of me.
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A good man is hard to find -- but you'll mostly find him asleep.
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Why don’t you come up and have a little ... scotch and sofa?
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Anything worth doing is worth doing slowly.
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