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I couldn't believe it. It was unbelievable, that's why. My face was like a frozen fish finger. All rigid and pale. (But obviously not with breadcrumbs on it.)

Louise Rennison

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Louise Rennison
Age: 64 †
Born: 1951
Born: November 11
Died: 2016
Died: February 29
Author
Comedian
Journalist
Writer
Fishes
Obviously
Fingers
Rigid
Couldn
Frozen
Face
Unbelievable
Faces
Finger
Believe
Pale
Like
Fish

More quotes by Louise Rennison

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Honestly, what planet do these people live on? And why isn't it farther away?
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Maybe he overreacted a bit. - A bit? That's like Hitler saying, 'Oooh, I just meant to go for a little walk, but then I accidentally invaded Poland.
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Here is another marvy glimpse into the gothic basement that I call my mind.
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Cor, love a duck. And also Lawks-a-mercy. I said that inwardly, but outwardly I said, Blimey, and also, what larks.
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I don't want to be rude to the afflicted but Uncle Eddie is bald in a way which is the baldest I have ever seen.
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Out on the moors, The lonely moors, I roll around in sheep poo. Heathcliff, it's youuuuu, I hate you, I love you tooooo. Let me in, I'm here, it's meeeee, Catheeeeeeee. Look out of your windooooow.
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There he is, tall, tanned, Italian, sophisticated. So what do you do? I said, Er, leap on him and snog him within an inch of his life? Taking care not to strangle myself on his false beard, or disturb his banana.
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I will not have him in my brainthere is no room for anyone else in the cakeshop of agony. it's crowded enough in there already.
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He had everything a dream boy should have. Back, front, sides, Everything. A head.
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When Mutti and Vati came in I didn't speak to them. I just unfurled the CAT MOLESTERS banner I had made.
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You are not ashamed of our luuurve, are you, Jas?' 'Look, shut up, people might hear.' 'What do you mean, the people who live in the telephone?
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I am exhausted by trying to get along with the Lord.
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...Then it said on the news, And tonight the Prime Minister has just got to Number Ten. I looked down at Jas and said, Ooer. Meaning he'd got to number ten on the snogging scale. And then we both laughed like loons. Vati just looked at us like we were mad.
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Mr. Darcy was in Pride and Prejudice and at first he was all snooty and huffy then he fell in a lake and came out with his shirt all wet. And then we all loved him. In a swoony way.
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Watching TV mum said, Do you miss your dad? And I said, Who?
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Its okay I'm wearing really big knickers.
Louise Rennison
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I don't know what's going on with Mum and Dad, but it's weird. Mum keeps asking Dad to do things and he keeps doing them Unfotunately, she hasn't said 'Hand over your money and make your way to Europe!
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Unbelievable! I said, What would I be doing walking the streets at night as a stuffed olive- gate-crashing cocktail parties?
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I am looking at you and you are looking at me. This is very good. I am looking and I am liking. You are looking and you are thinking, 'I hope she doesn't hit me with her crop.' But that is because I am me and you are you.
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When uncle Eddie does his impression of 'Like a Virgin' it's like Madonna is coming out of his body!' Christ what an image.
Louise Rennison