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I could have quite literally snogged until the cows came home. And when they came home I would have shouted, WHAT HAVE YOU COWS COME HOME FOR? CAN'T YOU SEE I'M SNOGGING, YOU STUPID HERBIVORES???
Louise Rennison
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Louise Rennison
Age: 64 †
Born: 1951
Born: November 11
Died: 2016
Died: February 29
Author
Comedian
Journalist
Writer
Stupid
Quite
Came
Home
Herbivores
Come
Snogging
Would
Shouted
Cows
Literally
More quotes by Louise Rennison
Dad at breakfast today being very quiet. I notice he is clean shaven. I said to him, Vati, what has happened to the little beaver that used to live on the end of your chin?
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Unbelievable! I said, What would I be doing walking the streets at night as a stuffed olive- gate-crashing cocktail parties?
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I am exhausted by trying to get along with the Lord.
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Honestly, what planet do these people live on? And why isn't it farther away?
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Vaisey looked like a startled earwig.
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At that point Ms Fox came in and said, Hello, carry on as if I am not here. Then she lay down on the floor.
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Rosie get off your desk, and please put your beard away.
Louise Rennison
You are not ashamed of our luuurve, are you, Jas?' 'Look, shut up, people might hear.' 'What do you mean, the people who live in the telephone?
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I don't want to be rude to the afflicted but Uncle Eddie is bald in a way which is the baldest I have ever seen.
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How many times do we all have to do this? Get up, go to school, again? Before everyone admits it's a crap idea?
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He had everything a dream boy should have. Back, front, sides, Everything. A head.
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...Then it said on the news, And tonight the Prime Minister has just got to Number Ten. I looked down at Jas and said, Ooer. Meaning he'd got to number ten on the snogging scale. And then we both laughed like loons. Vati just looked at us like we were mad.
Louise Rennison
I wanted to kill her and make her eat her fringe. And her knickers.
Louise Rennison
I put my arm around her and said, Jas, I have found that when you are troubled, it is often better to think of others rather than yourself. I think you would feel much better if you got me some milky coffee and jammy dodgers and I told you all about me.
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As I have often said, she has two styles of acting: with or without the beard.
Louise Rennison
I will not have him in my brainthere is no room for anyone else in the cakeshop of agony. it's crowded enough in there already.
Louise Rennison
Maybe he overreacted a bit. - A bit? That's like Hitler saying, 'Oooh, I just meant to go for a little walk, but then I accidentally invaded Poland.
Louise Rennison
Still, life carries on. Exams to be examined. Serious things to be thingied.
Louise Rennison
Cor, love a duck. And also Lawks-a-mercy. I said that inwardly, but outwardly I said, Blimey, and also, what larks.
Louise Rennison
Your soul shines through even if you haven't got mascara on
Louise Rennison