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If you fall down those stairs and break both of your legs, don't come running to me!

Louise Rennison

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Louise Rennison
Age: 64 †
Born: 1951
Born: November 11
Died: 2016
Died: February 29
Author
Comedian
Journalist
Writer
Break
Fall
Running
Come
Stairs
Legs

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And that's when it fell off in my hand
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Rosie get off your desk, and please put your beard away.
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P.P.S. I am giving you telepathic hugs. P.P.P.S. But not in a telepathically lezzie way.
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I can already feel myself getting fed up with boys and I haven't had anything to do with them yet - Georgia Nicolson
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There he is, tall, tanned, Italian, sophisticated. So what do you do? I said, Er, leap on him and snog him within an inch of his life? Taking care not to strangle myself on his false beard, or disturb his banana.
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He had everything a dream boy should have. Back, front, sides, Everything. A head.
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As I have often said, she has two styles of acting: with or without the beard.
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Still, life carries on. Exams to be examined. Serious things to be thingied.
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Dance of the Sugar Plum Bikey. Yes, that's got a nice ring to it.
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He has a song in his heart for me. I hope it is not Shut Uppa You Face, Whatsa Matta You.
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He came over and ruffled my hair, which is technically assault. I could get on the blower to ChildLine.
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Unbelievable! I said, What would I be doing walking the streets at night as a stuffed olive- gate-crashing cocktail parties?
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...Then it said on the news, And tonight the Prime Minister has just got to Number Ten. I looked down at Jas and said, Ooer. Meaning he'd got to number ten on the snogging scale. And then we both laughed like loons. Vati just looked at us like we were mad.
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How many times do we all have to do this? Get up, go to school, again? Before everyone admits it's a crap idea?
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You are not ashamed of our luuurve, are you, Jas?' 'Look, shut up, people might hear.' 'What do you mean, the people who live in the telephone?
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Dad at breakfast today being very quiet. I notice he is clean shaven. I said to him, Vati, what has happened to the little beaver that used to live on the end of your chin?
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I will not have him in my brainthere is no room for anyone else in the cakeshop of agony. it's crowded enough in there already.
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Cor, love a duck. And also Lawks-a-mercy. I said that inwardly, but outwardly I said, Blimey, and also, what larks.
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This is the first day of the rest of my life. So why is my hair sticking up like a cockerel?
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Dad has brought me a cup of tea in bed this morning! I said, 'Vati, why are you waking me up in the middle of the night? Are you on fire?
Louise Rennison