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Dad has brought me a cup of tea in bed this morning! I said, 'Vati, why are you waking me up in the middle of the night? Are you on fire?
Louise Rennison
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Louise Rennison
Age: 64 †
Born: 1951
Born: November 11
Died: 2016
Died: February 29
Author
Comedian
Journalist
Writer
Night
Waking
Cups
Bed
Dad
Brought
Fire
Middle
Morning
Tea
More quotes by Louise Rennison
I wanted to kill her and make her eat her fringe. And her knickers.
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P.P.S. I am giving you telepathic hugs. P.P.P.S. But not in a telepathically lezzie way.
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I am exhausted by trying to get along with the Lord.
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I put my arm around her and said, Jas, I have found that when you are troubled, it is often better to think of others rather than yourself. I think you would feel much better if you got me some milky coffee and jammy dodgers and I told you all about me.
Louise Rennison
I couldn't believe it. It was unbelievable, that's why. My face was like a frozen fish finger. All rigid and pale. (But obviously not with breadcrumbs on it.)
Louise Rennison
The tannoy is crackling but I can only hear heavy breathing and snuffling. ... Uh-oh, the tannoy is crackling again. Sorry about that, ladies and gentlemen, I momentarily lost hold of my pie.
Louise Rennison
I don't know what's going on with Mum and Dad, but it's weird. Mum keeps asking Dad to do things and he keeps doing them Unfotunately, she hasn't said 'Hand over your money and make your way to Europe!
Louise Rennison
You are not ashamed of our luuurve, are you, Jas?' 'Look, shut up, people might hear.' 'What do you mean, the people who live in the telephone?
Louise Rennison
Vaisey looked like a startled earwig.
Louise Rennison
Dance of the Sugar Plum Bikey. Yes, that's got a nice ring to it.
Louise Rennison
Your soul shines through even if you haven't got mascara on
Louise Rennison
Its okay I'm wearing really big knickers.
Louise Rennison
At that point Ms Fox came in and said, Hello, carry on as if I am not here. Then she lay down on the floor.
Louise Rennison
He has a song in his heart for me. I hope it is not Shut Uppa You Face, Whatsa Matta You.
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When uncle Eddie does his impression of 'Like a Virgin' it's like Madonna is coming out of his body!' Christ what an image.
Louise Rennison
Heathcliff. The hero of Wuthering Heights. Although no one knows why. He's mean, moody, and possibly a bit on the pongy side. Cathy loves him, though. She shows this by viciously rejecting him and marrying someone else for a laugh. Still, that is true love on the moors for you.
Louise Rennison
Out on the moors, The lonely moors, I roll around in sheep poo. Heathcliff, it's youuuuu, I hate you, I love you tooooo. Let me in, I'm here, it's meeeee, Catheeeeeeee. Look out of your windooooow.
Louise Rennison
When Mutti and Vati came in I didn't speak to them. I just unfurled the CAT MOLESTERS banner I had made.
Louise Rennison
This soft grass suggests 'softness' to me, but also at the same time 'lying-down-ness'.
Louise Rennison
And that's when it fell off in my hand
Louise Rennison