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When Mutti and Vati came in I didn't speak to them. I just unfurled the CAT MOLESTERS banner I had made.
Louise Rennison
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Louise Rennison
Age: 64 †
Born: 1951
Born: November 11
Died: 2016
Died: February 29
Author
Comedian
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Made
Molesters
Unfurled
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Came
More quotes by Louise Rennison
Mr. Darcy was in Pride and Prejudice and at first he was all snooty and huffy then he fell in a lake and came out with his shirt all wet. And then we all loved him. In a swoony way.
Louise Rennison
The tannoy is crackling but I can only hear heavy breathing and snuffling. ... Uh-oh, the tannoy is crackling again. Sorry about that, ladies and gentlemen, I momentarily lost hold of my pie.
Louise Rennison
I am exhausted by trying to get along with the Lord.
Louise Rennison
At that point Ms Fox came in and said, Hello, carry on as if I am not here. Then she lay down on the floor.
Louise Rennison
The fly in her argument is that when she says, 'they' will feel like lemons, we don't know who 'they' are. And 'they' might BE lemons.
Louise Rennison
Honestly, what planet do these people live on? And why isn't it farther away?
Louise Rennison
P.P.S. I am giving you telepathic hugs. P.P.P.S. But not in a telepathically lezzie way.
Louise Rennison
Out on the moors, The lonely moors, I roll around in sheep poo. Heathcliff, it's youuuuu, I hate you, I love you tooooo. Let me in, I'm here, it's meeeee, Catheeeeeeee. Look out of your windooooow.
Louise Rennison
He has a song in his heart for me. I hope it is not Shut Uppa You Face, Whatsa Matta You.
Louise Rennison
Watching TV mum said, Do you miss your dad? And I said, Who?
Louise Rennison
I could have quite literally snogged until the cows came home. And when they came home I would have shouted, WHAT HAVE YOU COWS COME HOME FOR? CAN'T YOU SEE I'M SNOGGING, YOU STUPID HERBIVORES???
Louise Rennison
Still, life carries on. Exams to be examined. Serious things to be thingied.
Louise Rennison
I can already feel myself getting fed up with boys and I haven't had anything to do with them yet - Georgia Nicolson
Louise Rennison
If you fall down those stairs and break both of your legs, don't come running to me!
Louise Rennison
I think 'growing up' would mean that you are incredibly tolerant and easygoing, liked everything, curious about the world because you weren't so egotistically driven.
Louise Rennison
Oh no. I've just accidently paid a visit to the cakeshop of love. I haven't put back my Italian cakey, but I have accidentally picked up a Dave the Tart.
Louise Rennison
When uncle Eddie does his impression of 'Like a Virgin' it's like Madonna is coming out of his body!' Christ what an image.
Louise Rennison
Rosie get off your desk, and please put your beard away.
Louise Rennison
I wanted to kill her and make her eat her fringe. And her knickers.
Louise Rennison
I will not have him in my brainthere is no room for anyone else in the cakeshop of agony. it's crowded enough in there already.
Louise Rennison