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Jas, you are three hundred miles away. You would have to have nunga-nungas the size of France for Jock to be able to rest his hand on them.
Louise Rennison
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Louise Rennison
Age: 64 †
Born: 1951
Born: November 11
Died: 2016
Died: February 29
Author
Comedian
Journalist
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Away
Jock
Three
Jocks
Hands
France
Able
Miles
Would
Size
Hundred
Rest
Hand
More quotes by Louise Rennison
This is the first day of the rest of my life. So why is my hair sticking up like a cockerel?
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Cor, love a duck. And also Lawks-a-mercy. I said that inwardly, but outwardly I said, Blimey, and also, what larks.
Louise Rennison
As I have often said, she has two styles of acting: with or without the beard.
Louise Rennison
...Then it said on the news, And tonight the Prime Minister has just got to Number Ten. I looked down at Jas and said, Ooer. Meaning he'd got to number ten on the snogging scale. And then we both laughed like loons. Vati just looked at us like we were mad.
Louise Rennison
Rosie get off your desk, and please put your beard away.
Louise Rennison
I‘ve said it once and I will say it again, why can‘t everyone just speak English? The Americans give it a bit of a go — why can‘t other nations?
Louise Rennison
And that's when it fell off in my hand
Louise Rennison
The tannoy is crackling but I can only hear heavy breathing and snuffling. ... Uh-oh, the tannoy is crackling again. Sorry about that, ladies and gentlemen, I momentarily lost hold of my pie.
Louise Rennison
How many times do we all have to do this? Get up, go to school, again? Before everyone admits it's a crap idea?
Louise Rennison
Honestly, what planet do these people live on? And why isn't it farther away?
Louise Rennison
I don't know what's going on with Mum and Dad, but it's weird. Mum keeps asking Dad to do things and he keeps doing them Unfotunately, she hasn't said 'Hand over your money and make your way to Europe!
Louise Rennison
I put my arm around her and said, Jas, I have found that when you are troubled, it is often better to think of others rather than yourself. I think you would feel much better if you got me some milky coffee and jammy dodgers and I told you all about me.
Louise Rennison
I wanted to kill her and make her eat her fringe. And her knickers.
Louise Rennison
Its okay I'm wearing really big knickers.
Louise Rennison
Heathcliff. The hero of Wuthering Heights. Although no one knows why. He's mean, moody, and possibly a bit on the pongy side. Cathy loves him, though. She shows this by viciously rejecting him and marrying someone else for a laugh. Still, that is true love on the moors for you.
Louise Rennison
Still, life carries on. Exams to be examined. Serious things to be thingied.
Louise Rennison
How do you make yourself not like someone?
Louise Rennison
Here is another marvy glimpse into the gothic basement that I call my mind.
Louise Rennison
Mr. Darcy was in Pride and Prejudice and at first he was all snooty and huffy then he fell in a lake and came out with his shirt all wet. And then we all loved him. In a swoony way.
Louise Rennison
I will not have him in my brainthere is no room for anyone else in the cakeshop of agony. it's crowded enough in there already.
Louise Rennison