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Oh no. I've just accidently paid a visit to the cakeshop of love. I haven't put back my Italian cakey, but I have accidentally picked up a Dave the Tart.
Louise Rennison
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Louise Rennison
Age: 64 †
Born: 1951
Born: November 11
Died: 2016
Died: February 29
Author
Comedian
Journalist
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Haven
Tart
Paid
Tarts
Back
Accidentally
Love
Dave
Picked
Visit
Italian
Havens
More quotes by Louise Rennison
I put my arm around her and said, Jas, I have found that when you are troubled, it is often better to think of others rather than yourself. I think you would feel much better if you got me some milky coffee and jammy dodgers and I told you all about me.
Louise Rennison
The tannoy is crackling but I can only hear heavy breathing and snuffling. ... Uh-oh, the tannoy is crackling again. Sorry about that, ladies and gentlemen, I momentarily lost hold of my pie.
Louise Rennison
I will not have him in my brainthere is no room for anyone else in the cakeshop of agony. it's crowded enough in there already.
Louise Rennison
Here is another marvy glimpse into the gothic basement that I call my mind.
Louise Rennison
This soft grass suggests 'softness' to me, but also at the same time 'lying-down-ness'.
Louise Rennison
This is the first day of the rest of my life. So why is my hair sticking up like a cockerel?
Louise Rennison
Heathcliff. The hero of Wuthering Heights. Although no one knows why. He's mean, moody, and possibly a bit on the pongy side. Cathy loves him, though. She shows this by viciously rejecting him and marrying someone else for a laugh. Still, that is true love on the moors for you.
Louise Rennison
When uncle Eddie does his impression of 'Like a Virgin' it's like Madonna is coming out of his body!' Christ what an image.
Louise Rennison
Unbelievable! I said, What would I be doing walking the streets at night as a stuffed olive- gate-crashing cocktail parties?
Louise Rennison
As I have often said, she has two styles of acting: with or without the beard.
Louise Rennison
How do you make yourself not like someone?
Louise Rennison
And that's when it fell off in my hand
Louise Rennison
What is that song they are singing Is it an old Yorkshire ditty you know like that 'On Ilkley Moor Bar T'at' Ruby said Nah it's a football song. It goes 'We hate Chelsea we hate Chelsea we are the Chelsea haters.
Louise Rennison
P.P.S. I am giving you telepathic hugs. P.P.P.S. But not in a telepathically lezzie way.
Louise Rennison
If you fall down those stairs and break both of your legs, don't come running to me!
Louise Rennison
Maybe he overreacted a bit. - A bit? That's like Hitler saying, 'Oooh, I just meant to go for a little walk, but then I accidentally invaded Poland.
Louise Rennison
Dad at breakfast today being very quiet. I notice he is clean shaven. I said to him, Vati, what has happened to the little beaver that used to live on the end of your chin?
Louise Rennison
I wanted to kill her and make her eat her fringe. And her knickers.
Louise Rennison
I don't want to be rude to the afflicted but Uncle Eddie is bald in a way which is the baldest I have ever seen.
Louise Rennison
I don't know what's going on with Mum and Dad, but it's weird. Mum keeps asking Dad to do things and he keeps doing them Unfotunately, she hasn't said 'Hand over your money and make your way to Europe!
Louise Rennison