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You can do eight things. We got it down to eight for you.
Louis C. K.
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Louis C. K.
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: September 12
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Comedian
Dancer
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Tecamac Municipality
Louis Székely
Louis CK
Louis Szekely
Things
Eight
More quotes by Louis C. K.
You know when you see a mother someplace just melting down on her kid? She's like, 'Shut up, I hate you, you're ugly!'... Any parents there are thinking, 'What did that shitty kid do to that poor woman? That poor woman. I wish I could help.'
Louis C. K.
What we've done with our modern food supply is absolute insanity. It's not even real any more. You used to be able to give a kid an apple and they would love it. Kids can't even taste apples any more. Apples taste like paper to kids now.
Louis C. K.
I never viewed money as being 'my money' I always saw it as 'the money.' It's a resource. If it pools up around me then it needs to be flushed back out into the system.
Louis C. K.
Most Americans have so much crap, that you could lose most of it and still have way more stuff than the average Canadian.
Louis C. K.
Stand-up is probably the most solo performance in art.
Louis C. K.
Self-love is a good thing but self-awareness is more important. You need to once in a while go ‘Uh, I’m kind of an asshole.’
Louis C. K.
I've always got the road. Stand-up makes you so autonomous and self-sufficient that it really helps with that part of show business.
Louis C. K.
God is like a shitty girlfriend.
Louis C. K.
Every day starts, my eyes open and I reload the program of misery. I open my eyes, remember who I am, what I'm like, and I just go, 'Ugh'.
Louis C. K.
All talking is good, negative and positive. Stabbing is bad talking is good.
Louis C. K.
It's more fun to experience things when you don't know what's going to happen.
Louis C. K.
It's hard to know where your thoughts come from, especially when you have a thirst for material because you need it professionally.
Louis C. K.
The Jackass movies are honestly some of the best movies I've ever seen. I laugh so hard at them. Those guys are geniuses. If they had grown up with a different group of people, they could've been performance artists at Bard College, and people would be writing papers about them.
Louis C. K.
Being popular with an audience is a very rickety ladder to be on.
Louis C. K.
Plenty of crazy people in New York. There are so many crazy people here, I think it's like one out of every one person is completely out of their mind.
Louis C. K.
Life's too short to be an asshole, as an employer or as an employee.
Louis C. K.
My ex-wife, she really didn't like the material that I did. And that's something I regret, that I wasn't more careful about making sure that she was O.K. with it. I just sort of didn't ask. So that's how that goes.
Louis C. K.
Talking is always positive. That's why I talk too much.
Louis C. K.
I don't have a gun, but if I did, I would shoot a baby deer in the mouth and feel nothing.
Louis C. K.
Pushing the envelope' sort of implies that you're inside the envelope with everyone else, and you're trying to find the edges on the outsides.
Louis C. K.
