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I am really tired of looking at my hips. I'm seriously really tired of standing naked in the mirror and staring at my hips for hours and hours while muttering, You hips. You hips need to get it together.
Louis C. K.
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Louis C. K.
Age: 57
Born: 1967
Born: September 12
Actor
Cabaret Artist
Comedian
Dancer
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Showrunner
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Tecamac Municipality
Louis Székely
Louis CK
Louis Szekely
Laughing
Hips
Looking
Staring
Hours
Mirror
Together
Mirrors
Need
Seriously
Needs
Naked
Really
Tired
Thinking
Standing
Muttering
More quotes by Louis C. K.
Talking is always positive. That's why I talk too much.
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If I do something for my kids, I get a medal, because most fathers don't.
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If you can survive disappointment, nothing can beat you
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I've had soccer moms come up and tell me they can relate when I say that I want to throw my baby in the trash.
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I like being full, every day, with stuff that I have to do.
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My uncles were all funny. My dad wasn't funny, but my uncles were all funny. Now I go back and I like him better than them, they were manipulative funny.
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I don't care about the weight. You know, I'm lucky I'm one of those people - I can eat donuts, whatever, and I just get fat.
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If you're a woman and a guy's ever said anything romantic to you, he just left off the second part that would have made you sick if you could have heard it.
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When I am in a hotel, and I turn off the lights and the TV, I just freak out. I turn the TV back on and don't get any sleep.
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It's kind of awkward to eat alone in a restaurant because everybody's looking at me.
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I just love learning. I think learning is how you live. The verb of my life is learning.
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In 27 years doing this, I've seen a handful of truly great, masterful standup sets. One was Tig Notaro last night at Largo.
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God is like a shitty girlfriend.
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The only road to doing good shows, is doing bad shows.
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If the whole country had to have the same conversation that was safe for everybody, it would be a pretty awful place to live. There wouldn't be a conversation.
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When a person tells you that you hurt them, you don't get to decide that you didn't.
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I just always loved comedy and I really wanted to be good at it. And it was heartbreaking, 'cause I started and I wasn't good at it. I was only 17-years-old, so I had a lot to learn about life in general. But I just kept on trying. I was young enough and stupid enough and I had no other choice. I had nothing else I was good at.
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I do have very deep, fond memories of my family in Mexico City, but I also remember feeling funny for not speaking English - I was basically an immigrant. But I picked up the language fast and soon I knew that I wanted to be a writer.
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I could never sit down and write jokes.
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A very painful part of being a parent is having really negative feelings about your children when you love them so much.
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