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If reality TV has taught us anything, it's that you can't keep people with no shame down.
LIZ
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More quotes by LIZ
Who hasn't made mistakes? I once french kissed a dog at a party to try to impress what turned out to be a very tall 12 year old.
LIZ
I'm 37, please don't make me go to Brooklyn.
LIZ
I don't like writing in front of a lot of people, it has to be an intimate experience with people I trust.
LIZ
My mom used to send me articles about how older virgins are considered good luck in Mexico.
LIZ
After all, isn't that what really draws the line between childhood and adulthood, knowing that you are solely responsible for yourself? If so, then my childhood ended at fifteen.
LIZ
If I have learned anything from my SIMS family: When a child doesn't see his father enough he starts to jump up and down, then his mood level will drop until he pees himself.
LIZ
I already have a drink. Do you think he'd buy me mozzarella sticks?
LIZ
All around us, people were cool. By association, so were we.
LIZ
Who's got two thumbs, speaks limited French and hasn't cried once today? This moi.
LIZ
I only work with a couple of co-writers who I'm really close with, so they always know what's going on in my life and we talk about things openly, they know every song is true to something that I'm either going through or have gone through before.
LIZ
When stuff is coming to an end, people freak out and they act crazy.
LIZ
You can do some serious subway flirting before you realize the guy is homeless.
LIZ
Whatever the tiny bubbles sitting beautifully on the surface of the absolutely delicious-looking skin around his forehead and neck were, they were doing a lot for his overall appearance...and for my heart rate.
LIZ
Lizzing is a combination of laughing and whizzing.
LIZ
I've been writing for myself since I was a teenager - I got into top-lining for some other artists/producers, but the focus was always on my own stuff.
LIZ
We have a show tonight. I've never missed a show. Not even the time I had that virus they kept saying only raccoons get.
LIZ
It's never fun to break someone's heart, that's so sad.
LIZ
You didn't realize emotion could be a weapon? Have you not read the poetry of Jewel?
LIZ
Can't one human being not like another human being? Can't we all just not get along?
LIZ
I don't need anyone. Because I can do every single thing that a person in a relationship can. Everything. Even zip up my own dress. You know, there are some things that are actually harder to do with two people. Such as monologues.
LIZ
