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If reality TV has taught us anything, it's that you can't keep people with no shame down.
LIZ
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LIZ
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More quotes by LIZ
Lizzing is a combination of laughing and whizzing.
LIZ
It's never fun to break someone's heart, that's so sad.
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God, three weddings in one day, I'm going to be in Spanx for 12 hours. My elastic line is gonna get infected again.
LIZ
Who hasn't made mistakes? I once french kissed a dog at a party to try to impress what turned out to be a very tall 12 year old.
LIZ
You can do some serious subway flirting before you realize the guy is homeless.
LIZ
When stuff is coming to an end, people freak out and they act crazy.
LIZ
You didn't realize emotion could be a weapon? Have you not read the poetry of Jewel?
LIZ
All around us, people were cool. By association, so were we.
LIZ
I don't like writing in front of a lot of people, it has to be an intimate experience with people I trust.
LIZ
I got into songwriting because I'm not very good at communicating sometimes, just my true words, so music was always my way of expressing myself and being able to put things into lyrics that I couldn't say necessarily in my everyday life.
LIZ
My mom used to send me articles about how older virgins are considered good luck in Mexico.
LIZ
Can I share with you my worldview? All of humankind has one thing in common: the sandwich. I believe that all anyone really wants in this life is to sit in peace and eat a sandwich.
LIZ
If you're ordering me an edible arrangement to say thanks, I'd prefer a meat one.
LIZ
I'm 37, please don't make me go to Brooklyn.
LIZ
You can try to change New York, but it's like Jay-Z says: Concrete bunghole where dreams are made up, there's nothing you can do.
LIZ
Can't one human being not like another human being? Can't we all just not get along?
LIZ
If I have learned anything from my SIMS family: When a child doesn't see his father enough he starts to jump up and down, then his mood level will drop until he pees himself.
LIZ
Instead, what I was beginning to understand was that however things unfolded from here on, whatever the next chapter was, my life could never be the sum of one circumstance. It would be determined, as it had always been, by my willingness to put one foot in front of the other, moving forward, come what may.
LIZ
I already have a drink. Do you think he'd buy me mozzarella sticks?
LIZ
After all, isn't that what really draws the line between childhood and adulthood, knowing that you are solely responsible for yourself? If so, then my childhood ended at fifteen.
LIZ