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Honey, the only experts in PMS are men. That's why men are so good at fighting wars they learned Escape and Evade at home.
Linda Howard
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Linda Howard
Age: 74
Born: 1950
Born: August 3
Author
Novelist
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State of Alabama
Linda S. Howington
Good
Honey
Men
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Wars
Escape
Learned
Fighting
War
Home
Evade
More quotes by Linda Howard
Women were always complications, bless their perverse little hearts.
Linda Howard
Don’t kiss me,” she said warningly. “I don’t intend to,” he replied, smiling a little. “I don’t have my whip and chair with me.
Linda Howard
He lifted the arm covering his eyes and turned his head to glare at her. I knew you were trouble the first time I saw you. What do you mean, trouble? She sat up, glaring back at him. I am not trouble! I'm a very nice person except when I have to deal with jerks! You're the worst kind of trouble, he snapped. You're marrying troubl
Linda Howard
Are you making fun of my hero complex?' Yeah.
Linda Howard
The world was divided into two groups: those who showered at night, and those who showered in the morning.
Linda Howard
...We have seven people who knew the skewers were there: the wedding planner, the reception hall manager, the dressmaker, the florist, the veil-maker, the cake-maker, and the caterer. I haven't ruled out the butcher, the baker, and the candlestick maker, either.
Linda Howard
Death isn't peaceful it is just nothing. Everything is gone. No more sunrises, no more hopes, no more fears. Nothing.
Linda Howard
He supposed he knew, rationally, that she wasn't the prettiest woman in the world, but if his eyes saw any imperfections, his heart didn't care.
Linda Howard
The bad thing about living in a small town was that everything became a personal issue. The good thing about living in a small town was that everything became a personal issue. During times of trouble, the support system was massive.
Linda Howard
I have a real low tolerance for parasites, and you're so close to the limit that I'm already reaching for the flea powder.
Linda Howard
If you're looking for Mr. Perfect, you‟re going to spend your whole life being disappointed, because he doesn‟t exist. You have to get the best deal you can, but there will always be problems.
Linda Howard
He needed a woman. Bad.
Linda Howard
If death turned out to be a lack of being rather than a lack of consciousness, well, then, that sucked.
Linda Howard
Okay, let me get a pen. There were rustling noises. I can't find one. More noises. Okay,shoot. You found a pen? No, but I have a can of Cheez Whiz. I'll write your number on the counter with it, then find a pen and copy it. Jaine recited her number and listened to the spewing noise as Shelley Cheez-Whizzed it on her countertop.
Linda Howard
Life's too short to waste it on someone you can't trust. You should be able to depend on the man you love not to lie to you or cheat on you. If you have that as a base, you can work on the other stuff.
Linda Howard
Was the period of happiness worth the unhappiness that followed a breakup? Most people seemed to think so, because they got on the love train time and time again.
Linda Howard
His mouth was hot and hungry, and he kissed the way no man should kiss and still be allowed to run free.
Linda Howard
What are you doing?” she cried in protest. “Playing,” he said, the single word rough, almost guttural.
Linda Howard
Do you know why men name their cocks? No, why? she asked, trying to stifle her laughter. So most of the major decisions in their lives won’t be made by a total stranger.
Linda Howard
Cows are the Devil's handmaidens.
Linda Howard