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I bought a box of animal crackers, but there was nothing inside. They'd eaten each other.

Lily Tomlin

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Lily Tomlin
Age: 85
Born: 1939
Born: September 1
Actress
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Detroit
Michigan
Mary Jean Tomlin
Mary Jean Lily Tomlin
Crackers
Eaten
Bought
Boxes
Inside
Animal
Nothing

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If I had known what it would be like to have it all - I might have been willing to settle for less.
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Maybe if people started to listen, history would stop repeating itself.
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Truth is, I've always been selling out. The difference is that in the past, I looked like I had integrity because there were no buyers.
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Lady, I do not make up things. That is lies. Lies are not true. But the truth could be made up if yo know how. And that's the truth.
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Sexual freedom and liberation has to be of your own making. I'm stunned when I hear about friends' children, ten or twelve years old giving blow jobs. I just don't like the girls being used or exploited in that way. It's just indiscriminate sexual relating. It's just the isolated things.
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Reality is the leading cause of stress among those in touch with it.
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If you can't be direct, why be?
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But there are too many people that make so much money at the cost of lives of other humans and for no reason but to make the money.
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Nobody is here without a reason. I always had a different sensibility. I like a huge range of comedy - from broad and farcical, the most sensitive, the most understated - but I always wanted my comedy to be more embracing of the species rather than debasing of it.
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Did you know, throughout the cosmos they found intelligent life forms that play to play? We are the only ones that play to win. Explains why we have more than our share of losers.
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I'm not a religious person. I don't have any desire. To me it's imitative of a conventional culture. I'm all for it for anybody. I totally have a free and open feeling about how other humans want to live their lives. It's just not something that has any real significance for me.
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The start to a better world is the belief that it is possible.
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For fast-acting relief try slowing down.
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Thank God kids never mean well
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You can't expect insights, even the big ones, to make you suddenly understand everything. But I figure: Hey it's a step in the right direction if they leave you confused in a deeper way.
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I have always felt that humor was a wonderful vehicle to let us become connected with each other and ourselves… I try to portray the similarities and polarities in men and women, so that we can acknowledge and embrace our collective consciousness.
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What if it's boring - or if it's not boring, it might be too revealing, or worse, it might be too revealing and still be boring.
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Language was invented because of the deep human need to complain.
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I was always drawn to more the social-expression-of-culture types.
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Growing up in Michigan was fine...until I realized where I was.
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