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I bought a box of animal crackers, but there was nothing inside. They'd eaten each other.

Lily Tomlin

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Lily Tomlin
Age: 85
Born: 1939
Born: September 1
Actress
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Detroit
Michigan
Mary Jean Tomlin
Mary Jean Lily Tomlin
Inside
Animal
Nothing
Crackers
Eaten
Bought
Boxes

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Does your mind feel more and more like teflon? Nothing sticks to it?
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If life is so meaningless, then why are we always bringing it up?
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Lady, I do not make up things. That is lies. Lies are not true. But the truth could be made up if yo know how. And that's the truth.
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You can't expect insights, even the big ones, to make you suddenly understand everything. But I figure: Hey it's a step in the right direction if they leave you confused in a deeper way.
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What I appreciate is acknowledging to the audience that I think they have brains.
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I guess if people couldn't profit from war I don't think there would be war.
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If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?
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I have always felt that humor was a wonderful vehicle to let us become connected with each other and ourselves… I try to portray the similarities and polarities in men and women, so that we can acknowledge and embrace our collective consciousness.
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The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat.
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If I had known what it would be like to have it all - I might have been willing to settle for less.
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The whole idea of being in captivity in such limited space, especially in a zoo, causes elephants to suffer. They develop all kinds of foot diseases. They die. They get cysts. Not only is it painful, it eventually kills them.
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Sexual freedom and liberation has to be of your own making. I'm stunned when I hear about friends' children, ten or twelve years old giving blow jobs. I just don't like the girls being used or exploited in that way. It's just indiscriminate sexual relating. It's just the isolated things.
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I wonder what it would be like if we all became what we wanted to be when we grew up? I mean, imagine a world filled with nothing but firemen, cowboys, nurses and ballerinas.
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Growing up in Michigan was fine...until I realized where I was.
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Being a New Yorker is never having to say you are sorry.
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I worry about kids today - because of the sexual revolution, they're going to grow up and never know what dirty means.
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When I am happy I feel like crying, but when I am sad I don’t feel like laughing. I think it is better to be happy then you get two feelings for the price of one.
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If you have a dog or a cat, you know how developed they can be. How sensitive, how aware. They suffer. We all do.
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For fast-acting relief try slowing down.
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What if it's boring - or if it's not boring, it might be too revealing, or worse, it might be too revealing and still be boring.
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