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Instead of working for the survival of the fittest, we should be working for the survival of the wittiest - then we can all die laughing.

Lily Tomlin

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Lily Tomlin
Age: 85
Born: 1939
Born: September 1
Actress
Film Actor
Screenwriter
Stage Actor
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Detroit
Michigan
Mary Jean Tomlin
Mary Jean Lily Tomlin
Fittest
Survival
Laughing
Instead
Dies
Working
Wittiest

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Things are going to get a lot worse before they get worse.
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9 to 5 made people aware of equal pay for equal work. It hasn't really happened, but it has come closer.
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If life is so meaningless, then why are we always bringing it up?
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I mean yes to act out something or take chances in the performance is one thing. But in terms of a camera, whatever's captured is captured so that's a little more daunting.
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Well, if I can be of any help at all, you are in worse trouble than I thought.
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Does your mind feel more and more like teflon? Nothing sticks to it?
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If trying harder doesn't work, try softer.
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If I had known what it would be like to have it all - I might have been willing to settle for less.
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The whole idea of being in captivity in such limited space, especially in a zoo, causes elephants to suffer. They develop all kinds of foot diseases. They die. They get cysts. Not only is it painful, it eventually kills them.
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If you can't be direct, why be?
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I guess if people couldn't profit from war I don't think there would be war.
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If love is the answer, could you please rephrase the question?
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When I am happy I feel like crying, but when I am sad I don’t feel like laughing. I think it is better to be happy then you get two feelings for the price of one.
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Lady, I do not make up things. That is lies. Lies are not true. But the truth could be made up if yo know how. And that's the truth.
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I try to be cynical, but it's so hard to keep up.
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We're giving jobs to people who would otherwise be out of work if we weren't exploiting cheap labor.
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But there are too many people that make so much money at the cost of lives of other humans and for no reason but to make the money.
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Did you know, in the entire universe, we are the only intelligent life forms thought to have a Miss Universe contest?
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What if it's boring - or if it's not boring, it might be too revealing, or worse, it might be too revealing and still be boring.
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Why isn't there a special name for the tops of your feet?
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