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In Canada I'm not dealing with people who are bringing in baggage, they just get it. But New Orleans will be a bit different. If there's a group of people who have a right to be bitter, it's the people of New Orleans.
Lewis Black
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Lewis Black
Age: 76
Born: 1948
Born: August 30
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Playwright
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Writer
Silver Spring
Maryland
Lewis Niles Black
Bitter
Group
Groups
Bits
Baggage
Right
Orleans
Different
Bringing
People
Dealing
Canada
More quotes by Lewis Black
I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake.
Lewis Black
I do the same gig. I might change it a little I might slow it down if I'm in the South. I talk fast, and they're not used to people talking that fast.
Lewis Black
One thing I know about the rich, being rich, is that you can take money from me and tomorrow, I'm still going to be rich.
Lewis Black
When you're fund-raising for schools, then something's wrong. We seem to have lost some sort of sense of what the common good is, and if you don't have a sense of what the common good is, then at least give to what you think your specific goods are.
Lewis Black
I'm amazed that anyone is interested in what I have to say.
Lewis Black
It's a big thing now: A lot of people want to be assistants to celebrities. If you're pursuing that, you're an idiot. You're a moron. The shortest distance between two points is not a celebrity, or being next to a celebrity.
Lewis Black
I've got stuff about airline mergers, which just shows that my stand-up is getting more insane by the minute.
Lewis Black
It's absolutely stupid that we live without an ozone layer. We have men, we've got rockets, we've got saran wrap - fix it!
Lewis Black
The Democrats have responded to the Republicans' lack of dealing with reality by truly not dealing with reality, either.
Lewis Black
The last person to get across that town in under three hours was yelling The British are coming! The British are coming!
Lewis Black
That's the funny thing about religion: it doesn't matter what you say, you're going to upset someone.
Lewis Black
This is how sad my life is: I got a scar from scratching my chicken pox too much. That's my big scar story. I really have no major scars.
Lewis Black
Writing is thinking and thinking is hard work.
Lewis Black
Donald Trump came out as a birther, which is Republican for, 'I'm running for president.'
Lewis Black
I don't know if watching Chaz Bono will turn your kids into transsexuals, but I'm pretty sure that letting them watch Keith Ablow will turn them into assholes
Lewis Black
I would like to play Pebble Beach at some point. I keep waiting for them to call and ask me to that little pro-am thing, but I'm not big enough.
Lewis Black
When I was a kid, you ate, and you drank, and you passed out and nobody woke you up and said, 'Let's go shopping.
Lewis Black
The Droid I had actually seemed to have free will, which I thought was interesting.
Lewis Black
If you want to get an audience quiet, just say abortion and everybody shuts up and the tension in the room is spectacular.
Lewis Black
Basically I wake up in the morning and I think everything's going to be great. I'm really kind of optimistic, and I look forward to a new day. I pick up 'The New York Times,' and I look at the front page and realize that once again I'm wrong. I start to fixate on stuff.
Lewis Black
