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Mother Teresa had a mustache. Hitler had a mustache. Mother Teresa is Hitler.

Lewis Black

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Lewis Black
Age: 76
Born: 1948
Born: August 30
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Playwright
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Writer
Silver Spring
Maryland
Lewis Niles Black
Mustache
Hitler
Mother
Teresa

More quotes by Lewis Black

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When we anticipate, we're the happiest. Unless you're on antidepressants. The reason you take antidepressants is because you can't anticipate. You think everything's going to be horrible, so it usually is.
Lewis Black
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The people we elect aren't bipartisan. The American public is bipartisan.
Lewis Black
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There is absolutely nothing you can learn out of one bllodeshot eye.
Lewis Black
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I am angry that the Democrats don't have the ability to explain to Republicans that we should be able to feed people in this country, and that is not socialism.
Lewis Black
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Glenn Beck is offended! Glenn Beck thinks playing the Nazi card is going too far. Glenn Beck. this is a guy who uses more Swastika props and video of the Nuremberg rallies than the History Channel.
Lewis Black
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Republicans and Democrats can barely do what they're supposed to do, and they sure can't do math!
Lewis Black
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The whole Valentine's thing is fine, but you don't back it up right next to the biggest gift-giving holiday of the year. Unbelievable. And we find it acceptable.
Lewis Black
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The one thing I think we learned this year is that the Democrats and the Republicans are completely worthless.
Lewis Black
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On the plane was a Time magazine and there was a 30 page article on diabetes, and I read every page. By the time that plane landed, I had diabetes.
Lewis Black
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You know. I don't think I'm gonna be Jewish for very long.
Lewis Black
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It was the coldest winter ever! I thought last winter was the coldest winter ever, but I was wrong now wasn't I? You see because I travel all the time. So last winter, I'd be in the midwest, and the blizzard would hit. And then I'd fly home, and the blizzard would hit again!
Lewis Black
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I've always been a social network retard, even before there was a social network. People would say, You want to go to this party and do some networking?
Lewis Black
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It's a privilege to pay taxes. Yeah! It's not a political question, folks. We have to pay for stuff.
Lewis Black
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What you don't do, if you're an adult, is decide that you're going to budget things through a sequester. What does that word have to do with budgeting? It's like if you have a family budget and go, 'We really don't know what to take out economically from the budget, so we're going to whack out protein for this week.'
Lewis Black
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When a country wants television more than they want clean water, they've lost their grip.
Lewis Black
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I'm a happy person but an angry citizen.
Lewis Black
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I was broke until I was 40. Really broke. I could get by, but I had nothing. No health insurance, so if something happened I was screwed. I was lucky my parents had money and my brother was willing to support me for a long time. Once I started doing standup, I had an income, and that was amazing to me.
Lewis Black
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What is the difference between a Democrat and a Republican? A Democrat blows, a Republican sucks.
Lewis Black
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Nyquil comes in two colors, red and green, and it's the only thing on the planet that tastes like red and green.
Lewis Black
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I do like Guinness, I have to say, because you feel like you're eating something.
Lewis Black