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I think one reason people play golf is it allows them to obsess about something other than the daily crap. It takes your mind off that.

Lewis Black

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Lewis Black
Age: 76
Born: 1948
Born: August 30
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Producer
Playwright
Radio Personality
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Television Presenter
Voice Actor
Writer
Silver Spring
Maryland
Lewis Niles Black
Takes
Reason
Play
Mind
Obsess
Something
Crap
Think
Allows
Thinking
Daily
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Golf

More quotes by Lewis Black

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One thing I know about the rich, being rich, is that you can take money from me and tomorrow, I'm still going to be rich.
Lewis Black
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It's 'Six Degrees of Kevin Bacon, except there's just one degree, and Kevin Bacon is Hitler. Can I play? Let's see. Mother Teresa had a mustache. Hitler had a mustache. Mother Teresa is Hitler!
Lewis Black
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sometimes i wonder does god just not care are is he to busy ignoring your prayers
Lewis Black
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I went to New Zealand this year, and, whew man, I know a lot of people want to go there. But let me just tell you, it's 22 hours by plane. So, if you have the opportunity, don't.
Lewis Black
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I watch some CNN and a lot of Fox, because it helps me get irritated.
Lewis Black
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Turns out we've been eating the wrong things...since the dawn of civilisation
Lewis Black
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There is absolutely nothing you can learn out of one bllodeshot eye.
Lewis Black
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Donald Trump came out as a birther, which is Republican for, 'I'm running for president.'
Lewis Black
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Every time I use an app, part of my brain dies! We'll get to the point where we go to bed and wonder: 'Did I have a thought today?' You'll have to go to your 'Thought' app!
Lewis Black
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Just relax and breathe through your ass.
Lewis Black
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I am angry that the Democrats don't have the ability to explain to Republicans that we should be able to feed people in this country, and that is not socialism.
Lewis Black
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I would like to play Pebble Beach at some point. I keep waiting for them to call and ask me to that little pro-am thing, but I'm not big enough.
Lewis Black
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In my lifetime, we've gone from Eisenhower to George W. Bush. We've gone from John F. Kennedy to Al Gore. If this is evolution, I believe that in twelve years, we'll be voting for plants.
Lewis Black
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There should be a law that you can't shut down the government - that you don't have that power.
Lewis Black
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Mother Teresa had a mustache. Hitler had a mustache. Mother Teresa is Hitler.
Lewis Black
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I love anything that gets me outside of my own head. I love music because it's really just - I tried to play piano as a kid. I was awful. It didn't help, and this is absolutely true, that my piano teacher had arthritis. And that's not a good way to learn.
Lewis Black
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When a country wants television more than they want clean water, they've lost their grip.
Lewis Black
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This is what I've been waiting for my whole life. A President who's not afraid to tell the truth about being a lying a**hole.
Lewis Black
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I get an idea about something. I just start thinking about it, and then I get onstage and I talk about it, and then I think about it some more and talk about it some more, and think about it some more and talk about it some more, until it starts to take a shape.
Lewis Black
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I do like Guinness, I have to say, because you feel like you're eating something.
Lewis Black