Quote

Freedom of speech is a two way street, man. You have the right to say whatever you want and the Boss has a right to tell the police to arrest you.

Lenny Bruce

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Lenny Bruce
Age: 40 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 13
Died: 1966
Died: August 3
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Screenwriter
Singer
Writer
Mineola
New York
Right
Police
Way
Street
Men
Speech
Streets
Whatever
Freedom
Tell
Arrest
Two
Boss

More quotes by Lenny Bruce

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The crooks downtown figured out that comedy is like a hammer. It can put up a barn and it can knock down a wall. So they bought it outright and marketed it as Comedy Central.
Lenny Bruce
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I'm sure that half the buzz from smoking grass was the fact that it was so illegal.
Lenny Bruce
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The role of a comedian is to make the audience laugh, at a minimum of once every fifteen seconds.
Lenny Bruce
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You got a million drug laws now because the bosses figured there was more money in putting people in jail than taxing something anyone can grow on a window sill.
Lenny Bruce
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If you believe there is a God, a God that made your body, and yet you think that you can do anything with that body that's dirty, then the fault lies with the manufacturer.
Lenny Bruce
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Trying to figure things out was my gig. Without the human condition, there's no struggle, no pain and that means no laughter.
Lenny Bruce
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You got to pay your dues to get the joke. Besides, laughter is cheap and very portable. If there's a pogrom, or they're blaming you for the plague, nothing is easier to pack than a sense of humor.
Lenny Bruce
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Satire is tragedy plus time.
Lenny Bruce
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I am influenced by every second of my waking hour.
Lenny Bruce
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All my humor is based upon destruction and despair.
Lenny Bruce
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Guys are like dogs. They keep comin' back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time, they're gone.
Lenny Bruce
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Every group, every system has a set of values and morals and when you get outside those, then the alarms ring. I was politically incorrect to 95% of the country luckily my 5% had the bread to come see me.
Lenny Bruce
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You can't just run out and start the car until some cat invents a car.
Lenny Bruce
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I want to perform an unnatural act.
Lenny Bruce
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If Jesus had been killed twenty years ago, Catholic school children would be wearing little electric chairs around their necks instead of crosses.
Lenny Bruce
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The reason I'm in this business, I assume all performers are -- it's Look at me, Ma! It's acceptance, you know -- Look at me, Ma, look at me, Ma, look at me, Ma. And if your mother watches, you'll show off till you're exhausted but if your mother goes, Ptshew!
Lenny Bruce
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Faith is to the human what sand is to the ostrich.
Lenny Bruce
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I was a Jew talking about Goyim religion. If I had just stuck to Moses, everything would have been cool. But, copping to being part of the whole Christ murder conspiracy got everyone goose-stepping again.
Lenny Bruce
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Children ought to watch pornographic movies: it's healthier than learning about sex from Hollywood.
Lenny Bruce
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I tried the religion scam in Miami, so I know how hard that gig is. But, if you can get it to work, starting your own religion is a license to print money.
Lenny Bruce