Quote

I was a Jew talking about Goyim religion. If I had just stuck to Moses, everything would have been cool. But, copping to being part of the whole Christ murder conspiracy got everyone goose-stepping again.

Lenny Bruce

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Lenny Bruce
Age: 40 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 13
Died: 1966
Died: August 3
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Screenwriter
Singer
Writer
Mineola
New York
Talking
Geese
Religion
Stepping
Christ
Moses
Everyone
Conspiracy
Part
Jew
Everything
Murder
Whole
Stuck
Goyim
Would
Cool
Goose

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TV is just advertising for your live gig, so I'm playing whichever show is gonna get me the biggest crowd.
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Children ought to watch pornographic movies: it's healthier than learning about sex from Hollywood.
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If you can take the hot lead enema, then you can cast the first stone.
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There are no dirty words, only dirty minds.
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There is only what is and that's it. What should be is a dirty lie.
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Wouldn't it be nice if all the people who are lonesome could live in one big dormitory, sleep in beds next to each other, talk, laugh, and keep the lights on as long as they want to?
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What is truth today may be a damn lie next week.
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I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner. We used to write songs like, What I'm going to do if I grow up.
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The only honest art form is laughter, comedy. You can't fake it... try to fake three laughs in an hour - ha ha ha ha ha - they'll take you away, man. You can't.
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You can't do anything with anybody's body to make it dirty to me. Six people, eight people, one person - you can do only one thing to make it dirty: kill it. Hiroshima was dirty.
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Once the country was settled and built, the bosses changed the order from a stack of educated workers to a barrel of minimum wage lottery dreamers.
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Satire is tragedy plus time.
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My only challenge was to tell my truth, man... figure out what I had to say. These days, it's not enough to boost that roomful of strangers. The young comic spends all their time trying to sound different from the million other jokesters grabbing for the mic.
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Satire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to satirize it. Which is rather ridiculous, when you think about it.
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Faith is to the human what sand is to the ostrich.
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You put a guy on a desert island, he'll do it to mud, a chicken, a barrel, anything, a knothole.
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When you're eight years old, nothing is any of your business.
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I am influenced by every second of my waking hour.
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You can't just run out and start the car until some cat invents a car.
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Darwin's theory is as dead as he is. Everyone is surviving, fit or not. Years ago, any kid dumb enough to chase a shiny object down a well was dead, and out of the gene pool. Now they got the technology and medicine to save the fool so he can breed more open mouth breathers.
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