Quote

Children ought to watch pornographic movies: it's healthier than learning about sex from Hollywood.

Lenny Bruce

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Lenny Bruce
Age: 40 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 13
Died: 1966
Died: August 3
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Screenwriter
Singer
Writer
Mineola
New York
Sex
Hollywood
Watches
Watch
Movies
Ought
Learning
Pornographic
Children
Healthier

More quotes by Lenny Bruce

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Faith is to the human what sand is to the ostrich.
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I would become a priest or a rabbi or a monk or whatever the hell was necessary to perform miracles such as taking money from someone else's pocket and putting it into mine, still remaining within the confines of the law.
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Satire is tragedy plus time. You give it enough time, the public, the reviewers will allow you to satirize it. Which is rather ridiculous, when you think about it.
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That's where the conflict starts. We all want for a wife a combination Sunday school teacher and a $500-a-night hooker.
Lenny Bruce
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I want to perform an unnatural act.
Lenny Bruce
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A lot of people say to me, 'Why did you kill Christ?' I dunno, it was one of those parties, got out of hand, you know.
Lenny Bruce
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Satire is tragedy plus time.
Lenny Bruce
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You got to pay your dues to get the joke. Besides, laughter is cheap and very portable. If there's a pogrom, or they're blaming you for the plague, nothing is easier to pack than a sense of humor.
Lenny Bruce
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You put a guy on a desert island, he'll do it to mud, a chicken, a barrel, anything, a knothole.
Lenny Bruce
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I've been accused of bad taste, and I'll go down to my grave accused of it and always by the same people, the ones who eat in restaurants that reserve the right to refuse service to anyone.
Lenny Bruce
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You can't just run out and start the car until some cat invents a car.
Lenny Bruce
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Guys are like dogs. They keep comin' back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time, they're gone.
Lenny Bruce
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If something about the human body disgusts you, the fault lies with the manufacturer.
Lenny Bruce
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The role of a comedian is to make the audience laugh, at a minimum of once every fifteen seconds.
Lenny Bruce
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Certain things are complete superstition and have no validity at all in the Bible. Yeah. They're just the antithesis of everything that is correct intellectually.
Lenny Bruce
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Every group, every system has a set of values and morals and when you get outside those, then the alarms ring. I was politically incorrect to 95% of the country luckily my 5% had the bread to come see me.
Lenny Bruce
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Never trust a preacher with more than two suits.
Lenny Bruce
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Part of the kick of making people laugh was doing something different. We were a rare breed - spotting one of us was like pinning a space alien, or abdominal snowman. There were maybe a hundred stand-ups in the whole country when I was doing it.
Lenny Bruce
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Trying to figure things out was my gig. Without the human condition, there's no struggle, no pain and that means no laughter.
Lenny Bruce
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Darwin's theory is as dead as he is. Everyone is surviving, fit or not. Years ago, any kid dumb enough to chase a shiny object down a well was dead, and out of the gene pool. Now they got the technology and medicine to save the fool so he can breed more open mouth breathers.
Lenny Bruce