Quote

Let me tell you the truth: The truth is what is. And what should be is a fantasy a terrible, terrible lie that someone gave the people long ago.

Lenny Bruce

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Lenny Bruce
Age: 40 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 13
Died: 1966
Died: August 3
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Screenwriter
Singer
Writer
Mineola
New York
People
Fantasy
Gave
Terrible
Lying
Tell
Someone
Truth
Long

More quotes by Lenny Bruce

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I was surprised when Nixon passed the test and showed up in heaven, but, I guess Hitler threw off the curve for our century.
Lenny Bruce
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The crooks downtown figured out that comedy is like a hammer. It can put up a barn and it can knock down a wall. So they bought it outright and marketed it as Comedy Central.
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Darwin's theory is as dead as he is. Everyone is surviving, fit or not. Years ago, any kid dumb enough to chase a shiny object down a well was dead, and out of the gene pool. Now they got the technology and medicine to save the fool so he can breed more open mouth breathers.
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I tried the religion scam in Miami, so I know how hard that gig is. But, if you can get it to work, starting your own religion is a license to print money.
Lenny Bruce
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That's where the conflict starts. We all want for a wife a combination Sunday school teacher and a $500-a-night hooker.
Lenny Bruce
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If you live in New York, even if you're Catholic, you're Jewish
Lenny Bruce
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The role of a comedian is to make the audience laugh, at a minimum of once every fifteen seconds.
Lenny Bruce
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Freedom of speech is a two way street, man. You have the right to say whatever you want and the Boss has a right to tell the police to arrest you.
Lenny Bruce
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All my humor is based upon destruction and despair.
Lenny Bruce
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I am influenced by every second of my waking hour.
Lenny Bruce
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Trying to figure things out was my gig. Without the human condition, there's no struggle, no pain and that means no laughter.
Lenny Bruce
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Part of the kick of making people laugh was doing something different. We were a rare breed - spotting one of us was like pinning a space alien, or abdominal snowman. There were maybe a hundred stand-ups in the whole country when I was doing it.
Lenny Bruce
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I won't say ours was a tough school, but we had our own coroner. We used to write songs like, What I'm going to do if I grow up.
Lenny Bruce
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I want to perform an unnatural act.
Lenny Bruce
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TV is just advertising for your live gig, so I'm playing whichever show is gonna get me the biggest crowd.
Lenny Bruce
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Communism is just one big telephone company.
Lenny Bruce
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A lot of people say to me, 'Why did you kill Christ?' I dunno, it was one of those parties, got out of hand, you know.
Lenny Bruce
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If something about the human body disgusts you, the fault lies with the manufacturer.
Lenny Bruce
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Certain things are complete superstition and have no validity at all in the Bible. Yeah. They're just the antithesis of everything that is correct intellectually.
Lenny Bruce
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My only challenge was to tell my truth, man... figure out what I had to say. These days, it's not enough to boost that roomful of strangers. The young comic spends all their time trying to sound different from the million other jokesters grabbing for the mic.
Lenny Bruce