Quote

Guys are like dogs. They keep comin' back. Ladies are like cats. Yell at a cat one time, they're gone.

Lenny Bruce

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Lenny Bruce
Age: 40 †
Born: 1925
Born: October 13
Died: 1966
Died: August 3
Actor
Comedian
Journalist
Screenwriter
Singer
Writer
Mineola
New York
Funny
Dating
Keep
Dogs
Money
Cat
Women
Dog
Back
Guys
Comin
Time
Relationship
Yell
Love
Guy
Ladies
Like
Gone
Cats

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When you're eight years old, nothing is any of your business.
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There is only what is and that's it. What should be is a dirty lie.
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All my humor is based upon destruction and despair. If the whole world were tranquil, without disease and violence, I’d be standing on the breadline right in back of J. Edgar Hoover.
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Life is a four-letter word.
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I want to perform an unnatural act.
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Every group needs a comedian. A comic who is politically incorrect at the Berkeley campus might slay them at a Klan rally.
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Once the country was settled and built, the bosses changed the order from a stack of educated workers to a barrel of minimum wage lottery dreamers.
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I am influenced by every second of my waking hour.
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You can't do anything with anybody's body to make it dirty to me. Six people, eight people, one person - you can do only one thing to make it dirty: kill it. Hiroshima was dirty.
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I think it's about time we gave up religion and got back to God.
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If Jesus had been killed twenty years ago, Catholic school children would be wearing little electric chairs around their necks instead of crosses.
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That's where the conflict starts. We all want for a wife a combination Sunday school teacher and a $500-a-night hooker.
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I was surprised when Nixon passed the test and showed up in heaven, but, I guess Hitler threw off the curve for our century.
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What is truth today may be a damn lie next week.
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You got a million drug laws now because the bosses figured there was more money in putting people in jail than taxing something anyone can grow on a window sill.
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I'm sure that half the buzz from smoking grass was the fact that it was so illegal.
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TV is just advertising for your live gig, so I'm playing whichever show is gonna get me the biggest crowd.
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I was a Jew talking about Goyim religion. If I had just stuck to Moses, everything would have been cool. But, copping to being part of the whole Christ murder conspiracy got everyone goose-stepping again.
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Once you sleep on feathers you can't go back to sleeping on the floor.
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If you live in New York, even if you're Catholic, you're Jewish
Lenny Bruce